Urging a perfected unison

time...and something about the rime of the ancient mariner...

Upon the eyes of love
carry everything
intricate...
cogs upon earth
clicking
ticks
notched where spline time
rolls along with speed
intensity
urging a perfected unison
bliss
we skate thin ice
hoping for the freeze
where time stands still
capturing magic
wisdom with age
but should a dance end
your left to begin
feeling weight
enchained
as hands press seconds
constant to your face
aware of how slow
grey clouds drift by
the toy
winding down...
something so slow
disappearing in a flash
hold
hold fast to Your mast
reinforce your keel
looking
to starboard side
where knots are breached
on prevailing winds
out there somewhere
calls
your island paradise
seek this treasure
and anchor time



  


 

 

Reviews

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

First, I love the "sea" theme, that you have carried off so artfully throughout. The idea of a ship at sea, searching for land upon a vast, blue void is so very romantic in so many ways. So, this works well for your metaphor. Worry not about what storms have battered your ships, torn your sails, ruined your rigging, instead, look forward to that treasured island, where you may find safe harbor to anchor for the rest of your days. Lovely...

[Souladareatease]

Indeed...I hold much belief in these things...no matter how corny the write may be--I will always live and die a cornball hehehe thank You Friday :)

[Lydia Shutter]

The change in font color was very effective in this write. "we skate thin ice hoping for the freeze where time stands still" A brilliant metaphor.....yes, we all do this for love. Put ourselves out there hoping this time it will be perfect. I also liked the sea faring metaphors. What is that one true love, after all, but a lighthouse urging us along the waves to a smooth sea? Very well written. Lydi**

[Souladareatease]

Thank You for feeling this Lydi:) tis a corny write-But I believe in it's truths--Indeed A beacon to Life truly living!!!-Thank You!!!

[Sami Khalil]

"we skate thin ice
hoping for the freeze
where time stands still
capturing magic
wisdom with age
but should a dance end
your left to begin
feeling weight"
Your poems always carry us into magical shores and beauty islands where we embark on a journey of self-discovery enjoying everything God intended us to enjoy in the arms of Nature ...Thank you for sharing noble sir...:)

[Souladareatease]

Our Nature...sigh--tis a cornball Write but I am so quite often guilty of being one--Thank You Sami

[Sami Khalil]

^^~^^ :)................