A plain temple, a play off, 'your body is your temple.'
I believe your second and third stanzas are the strongest, because they speak of the walls or stone built in order to protect from hardship; this in turns question why the walls? This person has been hurt before, wants to remain unseen, but also wants to be found. It's the person who spends the time digging, unearthing the broken relics that finds the treasure, a kindred soul, one worth the adventure. I enjoyed this. My one recommendation, and this is a suggestion is replace 'the apple of their eye' line with another simile/metaphor as its a bit cliché, but overall, well written, well expressed, and enjoyable.
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Thankyou very much for the review and constructive feedback. I will definitely take that and use it .. read moreThankyou very much for the review and constructive feedback. I will definitely take that and use it to make the poem better. I appreciate the appraisal and the praise and constructive criticism. Much appreciated
I am liking this. I feel there are multiple interpretations here. For instance temple could be a person who is not very flashy on the outside. Just a nice feel all around...bravo
Posted 9 Years Ago
9 Years Ago
Thanks for reading! I am glad that you liked it and thanks for the praise. I really enjoyed your wri.. read moreThanks for reading! I am glad that you liked it and thanks for the praise. I really enjoyed your writing aswell and will being reading some more
I am very interested in writing. Love to read others writings and really find the meaning within that writing. I love to write to be able to hopefully add meaning to others lives or help them in a tim.. more..