Sleepy Time Gal

A brief encounter with the Moonies.

“Do you have a moment?” A cute Japanese girl stopped me on the sidewalk and asked me. I looked around. I was quite sure she was talking to someone behind me or she had me confused with someone else. “Do you have a second to talk to me?” Sure. This hadn’t happened to me before. And I was lonely and I was gullible.  Her name was Ryoko and I told her mine. We greeted each other. It was her next question that blew my mind. “Are you satisfied with your life?” What question! I said in all honesty that I wasn’t sure. “Don’t you think there are so many things that are not quite right in this world nowadays?” There could be. The sidewalk we were standing near the University of Washington was getting crowded and Ryoko suggested that we move to another location to continue this invigorating conversation. So I followed her. It sounds crazy. I didn't know her at all. But curiosity won over caution. I was dumb like that.  It was a perfect sunny afternoon that only the Pacific Northwest’s brief Summer weather could muster- against bright blue sky, birds were chirping through bright green leaves, the air was dry with sweet breeze.  What could there possibly be not quite right with the world nowadays?

Ryoko and I made small talk about school and such on the way to a quaint little house not far from the school campus. She was soft spoken and very attentive to what I had to say. At the entrance of the house, I held the door for her to get in. She smiled her girlish smile, covering her mouth.

Nice house, nothing out of the ordinary, except a short man in a button-down shirt standing in the middle of the room. In this heat, he had buttoned his shirt all the way up to his adam's apple. His smile was so genuine it was hard to ignore. Ryoko introduced us. His name was Eric. He had a very firm handshake. “Let us sit down.” He pointed to the couch. We sat. Eric seemed like a nice man. “Have you heard of Reverend Moon and the Unification Church?”

Of course I've heard of the Moonies. I'm Korean. I grew up with seeing the Moonies mass stadium weddings on the news now and then. They believe in reverend Moon to be the second coming of Jesus Christ to finish the job he started before he was crucified. An old Sociology professor once told us that she didn’t mind the teachings of the Moonies but she still couldn’t buy the idea of some bald old Korean guy to be the Messiah. She wasn’t prejudiced or anything.

I was caught in a trap. The bait was a cute Japanese girl.  These guys were good. I gave up. I might as well go through with it, I thought.

Eric was prepared. He had charts and diagrams to explain the origins of the organization and their beliefs. Moonies believed in equilibrium in the world. The past is never forgotten. And the future is just as important. Therefore, people have to be paired up from different walks of life, from different worlds. The union must make amends the sins of the past. It should be a German and a Jew, it should be an afluent American Midwesterner and a poor Colombian peasant, and so on. Nice concept.

As soon as Eric found out that I'm from Korea, his eyes lit up and told me that I must be very proud. I guess, I said. "You should be, you are the chosen people."

It was a hot day. And being cooped up in the small room was tough. But I was being a trooper really. The whole three straight hours Eric was explaining the doctrine of the Moonies, I never moved an inch, not even a bathroom break.
"Man, you are very patient", said Eric while dabbing his forehead with a handkerchief. Sweaty armpits too, I noticed.

I glanced at Ryoko who was sitting quietly by me the whole time. There she was, mouth halfway open, nodding off in the summer heat.