Body Breaking Fast

I felt the coffee I spell on your cheeks; Yesterday.

It's of smells, the spelling in eating you - weeks.

Grains, greasy gloss with your kiss

Licks - on my heart, the beating and relics.

I taste the steam curl your hair through my teeth; kettle morn

Over the crumbs, the farewell in our feast: worn

Drip ? Cold, dawn, but good - dusk bye.

Husks (it’s the table, the tears and the hook). 

  

Reviews

[Twilight]

This seemed very genuine, showing a few human thoughts; and no sign of artificial construct from any online tool.There is a subtle suggestion underneath this piece, of the mixed emotions, at breakfast time; after a "one night stand" or brief encounter. And, various nuances which a computerised device could never find the most appropriate words to express. By reading carefully, I could find a rhyming pattern; even though it's not immediately obvious. The Body Breaking Fast, could mean different things to the writer. Possibly, a metaphor for her psychological state breaking down "fast"? Or, that the breakfast here; is occurring after the protagonist has endured a literal period of "fasting"? Then again, perhaps signifying that the breakfast and accompanying emotions; are correlating with the protagonist's return to having a "fling" - after not enjoying that temporary pleasure for quite a while (so in effect breaking the "fast")? On the other hand, the title may refer to none of those possibilities.? Either way, only the writer ever knows for sure; in such instances...

[Yoli]

Thank you being the first reviewing this poem, this one is very precious to me because i crafted it meticulously. True, i had prosodic ambitions over this little poem, it is very short but heavy in labour for its size, well done noticing the rhyming pattern, (there's also a rhythmic parallel pattern between the two stanzas ^^). I hoped it reads as a chant.

[Twilight]

Thanks. Keep writing and posting here, to help reveal the different themes which you're able to cover; with confidence. And, include more explanations within the Author's Note for readers and description box; to help with understanding your personal meanings.

[Yoli]

I will! i find it a nice place to archive your works, and grasp their evolution. Thank you for the advice, although i don't think i will make much use of the feature

[Twilight]

No problem. I'm out doing voluntary work, today; but will respond later - including a "read request" for you; possibly. Take care.