Go away

Your smile
your horrible glasses & your dark skin
Why did you come back?
I thought your absence was colder
I thought hating you was easier
I’m falling for you again
You cause disturbance in my chaotic brain
&
you ache my heart
Your perfume hasn’t changed, so how come you did?
How come you love me again? Why are you warm now
Is it because you are sick? or did you finally feel that I’m worth it?
I’m worth your attention?
Go back; go back to where you came from
These walls have learned how to be alive with the coldness you left
Don’t warm them to leave them again
Hating you is easier
I’ve learned to live without you
I’ve learned how to be alive without you
I’ve learned to be my own shoulder
I don’t need you. Don’t make me need you
Don’t teach me how to forgive; don’t teach me how to love again
I’ve burned your images out of my head, I’ve deleted your memories
I’ve learned to pretend you are dead. Why do you have to remind me of you?
All these years without you, I needed you
I wanted you
I cried for you
I cried because of you
I’ve grown a thousand years with your absence
Why would you come now
Why would you tell me I’m your favorite? Why now?
I’m tired
You make me tired
You consume me
I need to breathe again
I’m I ought to learn how to live with you now?
Or
are you going to leave me again?
How am I suppose to trust you
I’m scared of enjoying this moment
I’m scared that I’ll get used to your presence to wake up one day without you around
Leave me alone
I don’t need you
I’m on my own
I’m a lone wolf