Survive

A lost feeling of depression that is being eliminated

I run.
I run from nothing.
From myself.
I try to run.
The faint memory's of nothingness return.
I stop and look for another way.
Another way to run.
To run from it.
From it. The truth.
Me.
I can't scream.
It's in my head.
It's a dream.
It's a memory.
It isn't real.
It USED to be real.
Run.
Faster, Harder.
No escape.
Falling to the floor.
Falling through darkness.
Tumbling.
Crumbling.
Falling deeper inside the darkness.
Light comes.
I see the scars.
I remember it.
Torn apart.
Don't want to hear it again.
Not again.
My brain replays the seen.
A lost lonely girl.
World falling apart.
All into pieces.
She cuts.
Not to her wrists.
She couldn't face the shame.
The shame if they knew.
There is blood on her ankle.
I trace the perfect line.
Line of scars.
In a perfect little row.
They never knew.
They never saw her crash and burn.
They ignored her cries.
Cries for help.
She put the blade away.
She knew she couldn't.
Couldn't die yet.
But at night.
At night she runs.
She runs and fights.
She pushes the blade away in the lonesome darkness.
She pushes herself past it.
The pain.
The fighting.
The yelling.
Her dad problems.
Her family and friend issues.
The bullies and b*****s.
She tries to be strong.
She's still very sad.
She tries not to let it show.
She wants to get help.
She cant.
They can't know.
They wouldn't understand.
Do you?
Do you understand?
She made it through tonight.
She doesn't sleep.
What's the point?
She has no dreams.
She is me.
I  am she.
I'm pushing past it all.
I will succeed.
I won't crash again.
I won't let it get to me.
I just have to make it through the nights.
I anticipate.
Anticipate when I'm not alone.
So I  don't think about...
The pain.
Distract my brain.
Relax.
Don't touch that blade.
Your not her anymore.
Your at a new beginning.
Break the barrier.
All you have to do...
Is survive....