Lazy Afternoon (I Die)...

so it’s 4pm

and i still feel beat

baked a cake again

but it ain’t that sweet

i’m pretending to be

“i feel great!” ... (i’m fine)

but the next thing i feel

is so out of line

so... i watch “the proposal”

wish that i could hold ya

what the hell i’m thinking?

my mind so awfully freakin

alone again...

so bored again...

want more again...

so i find someone new

what's the time?

i feel all alone

it’s 4.49

as i sit at home

wondering what to do

since like half past 2

i feel i die...

baby i die...

Author's Note

my mind was just mumbling.... and so i put those mumbling feelings into words...

Reviews

[dw817]

As my doctor told me, suicide is a long-term solution to a short-term problem. :)

Here's hoping you are feeling less sadness and more gladness in the future, Niloc.

[N!LoC]

I know I said die... But .. I get dramatic sometimes... But really sometimes you just feel like it ... Your dr eh? Have u ever had thoughts of suicide?

[dw817]

Several times in the past. As it is, I have permanent nerve damage in my right wrist, and a stigma as a reminder. I see my Dr every week and will see him on the morrow. And - I came across another switch in me. I was watching One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest and I had a reaction to a certain audio in it.

Likely something from my buried past.

[N!LoC]

:-( Sorry to hear that ....

[dw817]

Avoid mental wards. Quite a bit can scar you in there and I'm not referring to knives. :/

[Baby Ricochet]

Mumbling minds can tell you all kinds of crazy crap

[N!LoC]

Yeah... But I knew my mumbling mind was making a point ... Lol

[Frieda P]

Sounds like it could be a rap N....quirky rendition of what it feels like to be lonely. I like this very much.

[N!LoC]

Actually I did have a certain melody in mind when I wrote this... More like rap singing lol...

[Frieda P]

That's how I heard it in my head too, well done.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

strong despair found in this one..even replacing isn't defacing the heartbreak...it still shows through, and the diversions are just excursions into temporary fix.

[N!LoC]

Haha a very dissected review! Lol thanks for reading ! Keep sending your requests too ok!