Cowboy Killer

You were the intensely slow-burning cigarette

Of my summer.

You evaporated so slowly

As to not be see by

The naked eye

Creating an oblivion

In my nicotine infected mind.

Every drag of you filled my heart

With such a euphoria that you,

And you alone,

Created an addiction

Only comparable to

A family of monkeys

On my scar-ridden back

Biting and scratching

Until finally,

You reached the naivety of

My heavily-guarded heart.

This paradise was followed swiftly

By you unexpectedly

And yet completely expectedly

Burning my emotional fingers.

I should have flicked you away,

Like the litter of society that

You are to me now,

Yet I kept you in my hand,

While I searched for that last fix.

Oh, the spell you put on me.

And now,

1 year later,

My eternal addiction longs for another cancer giver

To choke my lungs

With the joyful high that is love.

But for now I am left pining

And furthermore wining my way to poverty

And my habit remains

Uncured and unsatisfied.

One day I’ll get my hands on new smoke,

Only this time,

My scars will remind me of the previous error in judgment.

Until then,

All I can do is wait.

Impossibly impatiently,

While I treat the most painful burn

I have ever been forced to endure.

But as long as there is air in my lungs,

I will hold onto that cigarette.

No matter how horrible

The searing pain

Of my bubbling flesh may be,

I can never lose hope,

No matter how hard I try,

That someday

I will find my never-ending nicotine.

Author's Note

this is an old one. one of my first. i dont really know how i feel about it so im curious to know what you think.

Reviews

[M.A. Van Dyke]

I liked it. Time for a smoke, catch you later!

[Coyote Poetry]

I'm not a smoker. But I know many will died before quitting smoking. I like a cigar and a good beer. I like this poem. I do understand addiction. Hard to quit anything we truly enjoy. I like the description in the poem. A excellent poem.
Coyote

[heich]

lol...lovin it..

[Jonathan De Elvira]

heh...
good usage of cigarette as the main metaphor...
I liked your style..

[Ruth]

Addiction is a raw part of life, I can relate to this, however much I wish I could stop smoking (set a date, do it Poppy LMAO) Never easy!
A great poem love, unique and honest
Hugs
xx

[Looouise]

be see by - seen

1 year - one

You have a way of writing endings that capture the essence of the poem. "I will find my never-ending nicotine," that's really a good line, alluding to anything really - just as long as it has that same addictive quality as nicotine.

I did think there were parts where more punctuation was needed, so there was some particular flow to it, and some breaks where you could lay emphasis on particular words and emotions.

But hey, as you said, it's one of your firsts, so yeah. :]

[Aven]

it is a bit crude (as can be expected from one of your first poems), but the honesty and the creativity shines through. well written. :)

[Tate Morgan]

Oh my tobacco heart hurts

[Brad]

having had the love affair with nicotine myself i know this all too well, and i defended it's use until one day i got cancer...then it wasn't so friendly anymore...great job on this

[Wondering Mind]

Uniquely put and well penned... Original in approach, I like