AfterMath

This satirical short story follows a teacher's inner monologue. Sometimes when things go wrong, we second-guess our competence, our choices, and our paths in life. But everything always works out :)

“All right. So if we know that 5x5 is 25, we can figure out that 5x6 is…?”

I stare at my student. My thoughts will her to exclaim, “30!” 

3 seconds pass. I expect her to answer before 5. She clearly knows this. I’m a good teacher, I taught her well. 

2 more seconds tick on the clock. She is deep in thought. Look at the way her nose wrinkles when she concentrates…what a cutie. She hasn’t answered yet, but a few more seconds of think time should be enough.

3 more seconds tick on the clock, and she presses her lips tightly together. It’s taking her longer than expected to answer this…is everything ok? 

2 more seconds. Silence.

Oh gosh. She is struggling. Should I give her a hint? Should I let her work it out by herself? I look away, to give her space.

2 more seconds. What if she never answers? This question was too hard. I should have scaffolded this more, she could have used a reminder about repeated addition. 

3 more seconds. She looks down at her paper. I have failed. My teaching has led this student to a state of confusion. This could affect the rest of her life. Upper level math builds on foundations set at this age…if I can’t help her understand multiplication, where will she be in middle school? Or high school? Or college! 

Oh no. Because of me, this bright, beautiful human being will never make it through college. What have I done?

Another 2 seconds have passed. Why am I even here? This student, this whole class, would be better off without my dreadful teaching. What’s that phrase that I say all the time? “All right.” Goodness…how awful. I can’t even stop saying that, how am I supposed to guide these young minds to become productive members of society? I haven’t just failed this one student, I’ve failed a whole generation. 

My student quietly taps her finger 5 times on the desk. I look back to her as her face lights up. 

“30!” 

Author's Note

This is my first attempt at writing, like, anything. Where should I go from here?