A hard act

How to make an impression on a circus floor

A Hard Act

The Circus lights dimmed.

He stood poised one hundred and ten feet above their heads.

The crowd watched him dive into a bath of water.

As he stepped out there was hardly a clap from the half empty tent.

‘More exciting’ said the boss, ‘it’s got to be more exciting.’

A bucket he thought. I’ll have to improve my aim but that will bring them in.

One hundred and ten feet above their heads he prepared to dive into a bucket.

Removing it from his head he saw the silent crowd,

which was even smaller than before

drifting away.

We’re not doing well’ said the boss, ‘More excitement, we need more excitement’

A wet sponge, he thought. No! A wet flannel, that’s the answer.

Surely they couldn’t expect more than that.

‘More spotlights’ said the boss, they can’t see you hit the ground.’

One hundred and ten feet above their heads, he steeled himself to dive

into a damp

flannel.

The crunch could be heard all around the ring.

His screams were drowned out by tumultuous applause.

The boss came to the hospital, ‘What went wrong?’ he wanted to know.

‘The extra spotlights’ mumbled the artiste through a heavy layer of bandage.

‘The extra spotlights’ said the boss, bending his head closer to the hole in the plaster.

‘Yes’ came the faint reply, ‘the heat dried out the flannel.’