All I See Is The Sky

A poem about an intangible dream boy.

Laying in my backyard

under the stars

 

I close my eyes

and the perfect guy

enters my mind

 

Fresh and fly and smart

with an open heart

 

But when I open my eyes

all I see is the sky

 

Makes me feel

so unreal

 

A way I've never felt

smile to make your heart melt

 

Mad swag and mad taste

I don't care if haste makes waste

 

But still, still when I open my eyes

all I see is the sky

Author's Note

All (constructive) criticism is accepted and appreciated. :)

Reviews

[Dani California]

Dreams vs Reality..

mmm.. yes. We all do it. Paint that perfect
picture, be it a sig other - or perhaps our life as
we want it. Here's the key to this poem...

when you dream..

the "sky" is the limit! :):)

I enjoyed this ....
I relate well to it, as will most of
your readers, I'm sure.

Flows smoothly...
the first two stanzas
don't follow the rhyme/line
pattern of the other stanzas
-- but it works well here,
setting the tone a bit--
tells your reader what you're doing,
where you are--
and then what follows that moment
flows smoothly to the end.

Great job!! :)

[MarkGMelvin]

got a nice flow yo