You Forgot?

Clint just stood there, not quite sure what to do as he watched summer walk out of the kitchen looking truly scared, he had never seen summer look scared before, ever. He didn’t move, he was afraid she would snap on him if he did, but she didn’t. She didn’t even look at him she just walked out of the room. He felt offended, not that he had wanted her to yell at him but acknowledge his existence would have done. Summer wasn’t having a food fight with herself after all. He looked around at the mess, “I guess she’s right to be angry, it is quite dirty” he thought looking at the mayonnaise that coated the stove and the eggs all over the side of the counter.

“Well” he thought “time to get to it.” He started picking everything up, searching through the cupboards to find the Windex and the Lysol. He sighed, it wasn’t as If he and summer didn’t pick up the messes they made, they had made worse than this and her mother had never known. That’s part of getting dirty, you have to clean up. Clint wondered what summer’s mother had even been doing home anyway, she was never home. She was always at one benefit or another, and that’s when it hit him. He threw the sponges down and ran up the stairs. Flinging open summer’s door to find her laying upsidown from her bed. Feet against the wall and head on the ground, short red hair still looking perfect.

“I CAN’T BELIVE I FORGOT!” he screamed. She smiled at him with a giant smile, “finally caught on have you?” she asked. “And keep it down clinty; daddy would never forgive me if I had a boy in my room. He thinks ill get knocked up by just holding someone’s hand. I’d be grounded even longer, even if it is my birthday.” Clint felt horrible, he was her best friend. He was supposed to remember her birthday. For gods sakes her parents had remembered her birthday. But he had forgotten, and he felt horrible.

“Summer, I’m so sorry…I…” he studded trying to find an excuse for his horrible non best friendish behavior. “Save it” she said letting her body tumble over itself. “You’re forgiven, on one condition.” She stood up and walked towards her closet. Her closet was huge, and contained mostly cloths that summer would never wear in her whole life. Flowery and girly cloths her mother had bought her in an attempt to eradicate this “tom boy phase” as she called it.

Nervously Clint asked “what” knowing perfectly well that anything that summer would ask in return for forgetting that it was her birthday and not just any birthday, her sixteenth birthday. Summer paused pulling a shirt out of the closet and holding it up to her body before throwing it across the room and onto her bed. “Spring me.” She said simply like it was the simplest thing in the world.

“What?” Clint said, not because he was shocked but because it was crazy. “Spring me” she said again straightening up from looking for a pair of pants. “You know, jail break… help me escape this place clinty.” Clint couldn’t believe what he was hearing, it was impossible to get out of here even if they wanted to, they had tried it before.

 

“I hate them!” summer screamed. “I hate them I hate them I hate them” she had run around her room grabbing her cloths and shoveling them into a bag, before looking at Clint. “Help me run away.” She said giving him the eyes, “ugh,” he thought she knew he couldn’t say no when she made the eyes. “Fine” he said. Helping her pack her stuff into her ample sized suitcase. Summer had smiled at him, he remembered that a real completely genuine thankful smile before pecking him on the cheek and saying “I love you, you know that right? You’re the best friend I could ever ask for.” He had burned bright red at that moment before stuttering “we...we should go.” And grabbing her suitcase. They hadn’t gotten any farther than the end of her driveway before Rosita had come out and dragged a very upset and rater intimidating Summer Back into the house.

That had been three years ago, and here she was asking him to do it again. “I know what you’re thinking” summer said “but this time it’s only temporary.” She gave him the eyes again, dahm those eyes he thought, they were so blue and beautiful. “Fine,” he said. Sometimes he could swear summer was psychic.

Reviews

[The Old Ashes]

I'm liking the simplicity of the friendship particularly liked the flashback into their past. What a great little twist to add to the story.
Now we're getting closer, though in this chapter I pictured them more as 14. But then again, maybe I don't know true sixteen year olds. When I was sixteen my friends were nineteen and older and I was very rarely ever home, and most of the time surrounded by adults. Perhaps this is how real sixteen year olds are. :)
Loving it!
One little suggestion, maybe combine this chapter and the last chapter?
100/100
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[emily]

First off, no quantity of apologies can make up for the negligence I've shown for your work. You've been the greatest help in the world to Sons of Thunder, and I feel awful for not returning the favor.

That being said, I'm here to continue reviewing your novel! And I'm so happy to get back on it, because it's still a wonderful story. Clint and Summer's friendship has made me smile every moment of reading these chapters. You've crafted this beautiful friendship out of simple, understated storytelling, and that is hard to do. And the exchange in the "flashback" made me wonder what the future may hold.

Basically all this needs is a little light technical editing, spelling and grammar mostly. Easily fixable, especially if you're posting raw.
I can't wait to keep reading :)

Ohh Ps: I was left wondering what Summer's mother does for a living. Why exactly does she go to benefits? The only reason I'm asking is that I don't know if I'm not supposed to know or if it slipped my mind in the months I haven't been reading? Just a random question.

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[melissa]

I agree with Jake I also can't say that I blame summer for wanting to run away I would run away to if that was my mom

[.quan.011.]

This is well written chapter. You have great ideas, but you make tiny grammar mistakes. Nothing too major, just reread over some stuff like summer name such be Summer (capital S) and Clinty. Little stuff like that. Although then great chapter and keep it up.

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[Daydreamer54]

rater- rather.
dahm- damn
u should have breaks so we know your'e switching to the future even have it wriiten at the top of the paragraph on italics maybe.
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[PrincessZeldaWannabe]

I like that Summer is a tomboy - there isn't a lot of them in books and TV nowadays and it is seen as negative.
Another nice chapter!

[Jake Donald Stephens]

In the second sentence, I would change "she" to "Summer's mom" for clarification, because this actually confused me for a moment; I thought it was still talking about Summer.
I can't say I blame her for wanting to run away!
But something tells me they won't get much further this time.

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[tynamite]

It's nice that Summer has left, but for how long?

[Julie Beth]

okay its one thing to get grounded its another to get grounded on her birthday i feel so bad that Clint forgot aww i think in the flash back the reason why Clint didn't say i love you back is because he kknows hes going to die and he's afraid of losing her. I love this book so far awesome job :D


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[Coyote Poetry]

A very good chapter. A lot of question are opening up. Can they see Clint? I like the story. You have my attention. Thank you for sharing your powerful story. A excellent chapter.
Coyote