The balance here is fierce...you always voice from the depths of a passionate emotion...it weaves through your words with a heat...tangible and gripping...I'm not sure which is more poignant, that smile or the silence...both have their potent place in such cacophony...excellent Neo...blessings...
Posted 8 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
8 Years Ago
you must be one of the best who review my poems!
Poppy Ruth, i salute you!! :)
Thank .. read moreyou must be one of the best who review my poems!
Poppy Ruth, i salute you!! :)
Thank you for the constant motivation & the deep reviews!
i should take a bit of time to reciprocate!!
Thank You!!
8 Years Ago
Namaste dear Neo, you are most welcome, my pleasure :)
Like the contrasts used and the simplicity of this one. This gives me an impression of two people, of two individuals and of no one else, I don't know who they are, but it has worked. It's nice to review something a bit different.
Posted 8 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
8 Years Ago
they're very unique, rare & they fear for each other very much :)
thanks for your review! i .. read morethey're very unique, rare & they fear for each other very much :)
thanks for your review! i appreciate it!
SUPER COOL!!!! I love the way this poem is constructed on so many levels. For one thing, the mirror effect is very interesting - the first two stanzas are "reflected" in the last two, with the roles of the speaker and the subject being reversed. This expresses very well the idea of "karma," as you suggest. Repeated use of the "s" sound is also good. I like the repetition of "singing/sung in Silence" in the first, third, and fifth stanzas. The paradoxes of silence v.s. shotgun, siren, singing, cacophony, etc. are also intriguing. My favorite lines: "Your Smile is a Shotgun, / But my Silence is a Siren" (and, of course, the mirror image of that in the final stanza). Also "After all that has been unsaid" - very cool idea there! I admire you for your detailed thought and skilled execution of this poem. Excellent work!
Posted 8 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
8 Years Ago
that is one review that i will fondly remember!
you nailed almost all of my intentions behin.. read morethat is one review that i will fondly remember!
you nailed almost all of my intentions behind it ;)
thank you very much Alicia! makes me want to keep doing this!
Nice flow of thoughts upon one of my favorite subjects.
"My Smile is a Shotgun,
But your Silence is a Siren.
Emotional Cacophony,
You're Singing in Silence."
I agree and I liked the statement above. Silence can be golden. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote