One Step At a Time

This is just a story about a boy and girl whose about to do something terrible but peaceful.

One step at a time

 

 

“Why are we here?” asked the skinny boy. “Because life sucks,” said the girl. “True,” the boy agreed. They sat there, just listening the hiss of the cold wind. “Are we really doing this?” the girl asked. The boy turned his head slowly and looked deeply into her eyes. They were beautiful. “Do you want to give up?” “No,” she sighed. The silence of the dusk took upon them.

The sky was pretty. The blood colour blended with the warm orange of the sunset. Opposite to it, the sky was deep purple with stars hanging like spiders’ webs. “The sky is beautiful,” the girl said. “Ineffable, I’d say,” the boy replied with a curious smile on his face. He gazed at the sky thoughtfully. Meanwhile, the girl looked at him, studying the curves of his face. As though he’d noticed, he turned his face to her. She quickly looked away, blushing, but he couldn’t notice. Again, the silence took upon them.

A sad tune was being played as the boy looked down the city. “Where is this music coming from?” the girl asked. “Look,” he pointed down a fancy restaurant. In the corner, a violinist played; his fingers dancing through the wires. “You did not have to come with me,” the girl said. “But I did,” he answered.  She beheld his eyes; they were a dark brown hue, but a flick of gold lighted them. They were eyes filled with knowledge, but full of sadness. “Why?” she persisted. He thought for a while. “I don’t have a reason. I just came.” She seemed quite unpleased with his answer; the boy took notice. “Well, you see, my life is like horse s**t. Maybe I’m just trying to get rid of everything. I’m not doing this only for you, I’m doing for myself.” The girl did not answer.

“It scares me, how similar we are,” said the girl. He let the silence answer. “I wonder… I wonder if we had met earlier.” “We would’ve been best friends,” the boy responded promptly. “Yeah!” she grinned. “We’re both sons of b*****s, with no feelings that love reading!” The boy laughed and so did she. The excitement quickly disappeared and the silence once again took upon them. The dim light of the sunset made their shadows dance on the building. The wind blew harder and colder, making them give small shivers.

“Have you ever fallen in love?” she asked timidly. “A few times,” he said with a gloomy look on his face. “I do regret them all, that’s for sure. How about you? Have you ever fallen in love?” “The same.” A cold wind blew and the boy’s knit cap flew far. “Well… f**k,” the boy complained. The girl was absolved on her own thoughts and did not pay attention on the boy’s misfortune. “Love,” she said. “What a queer thing. I mean, it can f**k your life, but when it works…” He kept silent, mourning his lost knit cap. The lights of the city shone bright and beautiful down there like a huge chandelier in a ball.  

“I don’t know what to think anymore. I mean, I should be thinking of the good and bad moments of life shouldn’t I?” the boy asked troubled. “Maybe yes. But the best thing to do now, is to think of nothing. You will get needlessly worried and end up giving up.” He let her words pierce him as he tried to think nothing. “You know,” he began, “Ever since puberty kicked in, I have wondered if I do fit in this world. And every goddamn time, I got the same answer: ‘No, you do not, your worthless piece of s**t. Just die already.’ And it scares me, because it is the truth. As a child, I had always thought that life would be a piece of cake; I wouldn’t have problems, I would awesome, get a girlfriend, graduate…” “What about babies?” she cut him. “Nah, I would never have those things.” She laughed a bit and soon he joined her. “I would,” she said. “Well, that was unexpected,” he said astonished. “I don’t know why though. Maybe I’m just afraid that my blood will just vanish, since I have no brothers. “Maybe,” he agreed. The boy’s legs ached for standing for so long, so he sat by the edge of the building. He contemplated the sunset for a while. Soon the night would come.

The girl observed him while he got lost in his thoughts. “He’s changed,” she thought. True. The boy had gained muscles and his face had defined. He wasn’t that handsome, but he surely got other girls’ attention… and hers too. His nose was thin but the tip was rounded, which gave him a cute look and his lips were shaped desirably. His eyes though, were hard and cold, yet kind and sweet. He seemed as though he had lived hundreds and hundreds of times, over and over. Maybe that is why he constantly looks so tired.

The night finally came. The sun hid beneath the skirts of the Earth and the moon ruled the sky all mighty and shining. She gazed at him once more. He was shivering. “Are you cold? Or just scared?” “None of them,” he said stubbornly. “It’s just… I’m not a big fan of heights. Or spiders.” The girl smiled and got up to sit by his side. They looked at each other. Their faces were close. They could feel each other’s breath. Quickly realizing their closeness, they turned their heads away, blushing. “What about your family?” the boy tried to hide the awkwardness. “What about them?” the girl asked confused. “Well, how are they like? “You know the answer,” she said sharply, “But I’ll tell you anyway.” The street was noisy down the building. “I don’t know if I can this ‘family’… my mother is an alcoholic and divorced; my father is distant yet kind. My stepfather… I don’t know if I can see him as ‘family’. To be frank, I don’t like my family. What about you?” “I hate them,” he said as cold as ice. The air grew heavy around them; the girl could almost touch the hatred that overflowed out of him. Maybe she should’ve asked why, instead, she laughed. A true laugh. Stainless and sinless; a pure laugh.

He beheld her with astonishment, overwhelmed by her reaction. She was gorgeous. Her slightly puffed face and deep green eyes caught him, and her smile melted his heart. That brought him memories of their first encounter. At first, she seemed just a troublemaker. It turned out she was more. Maybe she looked like that because of her own problems, but when she was surrounded by friends, she would be her true self; a smart, beautiful girl, with a shy smile on her face, with an eccentric personality and curious hobbies.

Reality slapped him back when he lost his balance and almost fell. Holding the girl’s hand he managed to stay still. “Going already without me?” the girl mocked him. “Don’t you know the saying ‘ladies first’?” She laughed. “S-Shut up!” the boy said annoyed but slightly amused. Their hands were clutched together, her soft palm against his. As soon they realized that, they quickly released from each other embarrassed. The stars seemed to shine ever brighter.

The concrete felt hard against his butt, but it made no matter. He got up and gazed the view from the top of the building. “What a beautiful sight,” he said feeling inspired, “This is worthy of a canvas.” “Sure,” the girl answered. “A pity we didn’t bring any paint or brushes. Down there, the lights of the city shone beautifully. The familiar sound of people and cars made the boy recall his bedroom’s window. It was without a doubt the most wonderful thing he has ever seen. The thought of it made him smile. “I wonder…” he began, “I wonder how people can just look away of the truth… Oh wait, I do that too.” “We all do,” the girl said. “We just pretend that the world is not in chaos and try to live a fantasy,” she said rather annoyed, “We read inspirational quotes and lie to ourselves that everything is all right. We refuse to change; we refuse to get out of our comfort zones; we deny what is weird and live in a society in which the normal is common and the common is normal. In the end… in the end we’re all just going to die, right?” The boy had no reply for that. The words, or rather, the truth was bitter and lingered in the air surrounding them. He looked down the street and glanced a family having dinner at the fancy restaurant the violinist had played beautifully sad. They were smiling and laughing. That nauseated him. “Look at them,” he said bitterly pointing down at the family, “They are just sitting there, pretending that nothing is wrong, denying the truth even though it stands right in front of their eyes. They live a fake life, where everything is wonderful and colorful. What a disgusting dream.” The girl did not answer.

It was only midnight, but the city seemed livelier than ever. “I think it’s time we ended this,” the girl said. The boy just silently agreed. She stood beside him. He was taller than her. It made her feel safer for a moment. “Hey, are you sure?” she asked with a bit of uncertainty. He smiled. She blushed. “Of course.” They looked at each other’s faces, studying the curves, the traces, the scars. “Can I ask one last question?” she said. “Sure,” said the boy. “Have you ever loved me?” The boy contemplated her, and gave a gentle smile. “I don’t know; have you ever loved me?” The girl smiled too. Both knew their answers. They looked down the crowded street. “See you then?” he said. “Of course, you idiot!” she replied him with an innocent punch on his arm.

The wind blew harder and colder, but none of them felt; they were just looking at each other once more. “One step at a time,” said the boy. “One step at a time,” said the girl. And so they did. One step at a time.

 

Author's Note

Please, I do not think my English skills are that polished, so do not blame me for my terrible writing. Also, this is story is just me expressing my feelings through fictional characters. Hope you enjoy,