His Younger Face

It was a cold day

When he emptied 

His things 

Into a suitcase

He had scars 

That he was proud of 

From his younger days

But everything 

Made him feel

As if he was empty inside

And the memories of her 

He had played it safe

Its was a long ride 

But now 

He was somewhere 

Outside 

Of that younger face 

Reviews

[Kathy Van Kurin]

"His Younger Face"
Neal S.
Full then empty. Filling again, changing again. Your poem speaks of the awareness of time passing as if our inner eyes are watching our outside changeing.
Change:
"He had scars
that he was proud of
from his younger days"
to:
"But now
He was somewhere
outside of that younger face.
I hope you continue to welcome growth and change as in this excellent poem.
blessings,
Kathy

[Valentine]

It is a long ride from youth to maturity, but we all must take it. Valentine

[Neal S]

Indeed we do. Thanks for reading!

[Lydia Shutter]

We grow up and we mature, but we remember our experiences from the younger days. A bittersweet write filled with longing for what once was. I liked it. Lydi**

[Neal S]

Thank you ma'am.

[Kelly Scheppers]

...this gave me a feeling of regret...the third stanza that read "he was empty inside". perhaps we have our youth to blame for the puzzles of life left unfinished.

...a good thinking process, Neal.

[Neal S]

Thank you.

[. serah .]

~ i like the time-travelling in this piece of poetry... ~ for me, a piece like this triggers a million thoughts about the past, the present and the future... and there's something really surreal and poetic about being outside of one's face... very innovative and unique imagery to convey a complex and intense emotion... ~ excellent work, monsieur...

[Neal S]

Thank you serah. Lovely review :)

[. serah .]

~ you're very welcome... :)

[aLittlePain]

Geez thats a wee walk down memory lane. universal one bruv. Nice

[Neal S]

Thanks so much!

[Papaya]

This feels like a coming of age piece. Our scars, whether visible or not, shape us into who we are so we should not be ashamed of them. The only shame is that we don't start out as wise as we become. A fine poem Neal.

[Neal S]

Thank you :)

[Lorry]

If only we had the time and patience to put as much thought into our younger, more reckless selves than we do after the event. I think if we done a poll right now, 99% of us would see ourselves in these words Neal. Perfectly captured.

[Neal S]

Thank you Nemo. Appreciate you taking the time to read my stuff.

[Lorry]

you are very welcome, it's a pleasure to. Please feel free to send me read requests any time.

[Neal S]

Thanks man. I always feel a bit odd sending ppl read request. I feel as if i'm shoving a piece of paper in someones face like READ THIS!! :)

[Lorry]

Ha, well no need to feel that now I've said it is more than fine to do so.

[Neal S]

Got ya! Thanks Nemo.

[Lorry]

No worries. :)