Burn

“It was the time we burned the night” she said

Liquid dreams 

Moments in time captured on paper

Like bad lyrics eched on the mind

We walked the dirty streets like giants that day

In a fairy tale unknown to most 

But this was no mushroom to make you small

It was reality

We lived in the frighting beauty of the light

Blinded by its fury 

And we loved

Reviews

[Lorry]

Superb. This reads to me like an old tv show, which started each week with a voiceover saying "There are a thousand stories in the naked city, this is but one of them."...or something very similar along those lines.I can't explain why, but it also played in my head in black and white, with a neutral voice, which only expressed the passion and life in your words all the more. Perfectly captured.

[Neal S]

Thank you so much. Almost like one of those old film noir detective shows. Interesting way of looking at it. Thanks for stopping by Nemo.

[Kelly Scheppers]

I was mesmerized how you brought this to its end...as though love was the only thing that truly mattered. Nice to meet you, Neal!

[Neal S]

Nice to meet you as well Kelly. Thanks for taking the time to read this.

[Hebe]

wonderful creation... It can mean so many different things to different people. .. captivating!

[Neal S]

Thank you Hebe for taking the time to read it.

[Mitch]

This gave me a lot of clear pictures in my head. I really liked this piece. You were able to capture a lot with just a few words. I loved the line "Moments in time captured on paper like bad lyrics etched on the mind". very cool

[Neal S]

Thanks for stopping by Mitch. And for the kind words.

[Asante]

This was wonderful! Stellar imagery among all else. I really did enjoy reading this.

[Neal S]

Thank you Sante. Happy you took the time.

[Asante]

No problem! It was a pleasure.

[aLittlePain]

Hello Neal, Ana (Papaya) sent me here and I'm so pleased. This is my kinda poetry appeals to the musician in me some sublime lines and dope style. It's all that! Ray xo

[Neal S]

That's so kind of you to say. Thanks for making time to read it.

[Shannon]

A friend sent me here. Beautiful phrasing and imagery (but not so much as to loose my concrete brain). Gorgeously rendered.

[Neal S]

Thank you for taking the time.

[Papaya]

No critique. This is super.

[Neal S]

Thank you!

[Papaya]

You're welcome.