Part Six

Part Six

It had been a year since Helena’s husband had died. Just when she thought she’d been able to get over it, something small would remind her of him and she would no longer be able to contain herself. It seemed like years ago when he’d first touched her heart. They had just been children. He’d come over by himself from Germany and she had come to the countryside from London to escape the Blitz, as they called it. He’d been twelve, she’d been eleven. Helena’s face pinched into a smile at the memory of their past. The past was all they had now. No future, no present.
She took a deep breath and lifted herself from his armchair, her knees quivering with the effort. She hadn’t been as weak as this when Leo was still around. It had been his death that had affected her most. She had sat down for hours, making her legs go stiff and making them loose strength. She didn’t need much strength anymore though. The only reason she was still here was because of her children and grandchildren. Life seemed almost pointless with him, her love, there to live it with her. She knew he was looking down on her from heaven, and all she wanted to do was join him up there.
She sighed and collapsed onto her couch, purposely averting her eyes from his armchair, now so painfully empty. She shut her eyes and tried to remember his face, his eyes, and his smile. It was so clear in her memory. His long blonde hair and charming blue eyes had been the first thing that she’d really noticed about him. He had been so different to any other boy she’d ever seen. He was always playful, but he knew how to be serious. He had been like an older brother to her in their early years. That was until he’d begun to hold a new attraction for her.
Then he engaged.
Helena shivered with delight as she recalled his expression on his face when she’d said yes.
But then that was all the past. She must keep on living now, keep on going. Not only for the future generations of this family, she realised, but because she knew that was what Leo would have wanted her to do. Now he was gone, it was the least she could do. Because although his body may be dead, no one really dies as long as they’re still properly remembered. And Helena always made sure she properly remembered Leo, even though it was breaking her oath, the oath she'd sworn to keep in his last few minutes of consciousness.
"You must forget about me," he'd said, his voice horse and weak, "about this life, and just carry on living."