chapter 1

 

Chapter 1

My life was nothing but blood, violence, and struggle for survival. That was until I met her. I was born and left behind or abandoned there’s really no difference. Someone found me and I was taken to an orphanage. At the age of 6, I ran away and began a life on the streets. Their life was not easy.

                At the age of 10 I found a gang who took me in. they named me ricardo, since i've never bothered to name myself.I knew the dangers I would be in if I joined but what did I care. There was no one and nothing to live for, never was. It was a hard process when you had to let every member of the gang beat you and let them think they’ve broken you. How can you break something when there’s nothing to break?

                I’d been shot, cut, beat, and even been in the hospital. Yet I still came back ready for more. I had many of them die in my hands and some died by my hands. These were hands stained with the blood of a life. Unforgiveable, and yet I stayed. There was nowhere else for me to go.

                Then at the age of 16 I was a witness to the murder of the whole gang. I ran, ran from the horror, and ran from everything I knew.

               I ended up in the small town of deport, Texas. How long have I been running? The money I had been saving was running out. How long would it be before I died of hunger? Did I care?

                I found a really old cheap hotel to stay for a while. What I needed was a job. Was it really worth it?

                I began to wonder around the town not really meeting any one. They all seem to know and respect each other. So different from where I came from. New comers were rare apparently since everyone who I passed looked at me as a specimen, an outsider. I guess I was, in a way, an intruder.

                A week here and I have learned that most of these people have lived here their whole lives, some for generations. It would take a lot to make this place a semblance of a home. I met this man, he was a construction worker but did simple house repair work. He gave me a job and a temporary residence in his garage. His family is pretty big so there was no room for me, but I didn’t mind they were already showing too much kindness by giving me shelter.

                I started the next day by going with Mr. Jones, which was his name. He took me to his office and that’s where I met the rest of his workers. There were only a couple of 10 workers total. Small business for a small town, I guess you could say. Most of the workers had a look that said ‘intruder’. I didn’t blame them or hold it against them. However there was one man who came up to me and introduced himself as Mr. Hernandez. He was a kind looking man. Looked about 30, 40 maybe. When I shook his hand, his grip was strong and firm.

                “Welcome to deport” his voice was deep and scruffy with an edge of authority.

“Thank you, sir” A smiled graced my face after so long, not a fully fledged smile, but a sincere one.

I worked closely with Mr. Hernandez and Mr. Jones, since I didn’t know much of repairing anything. We were all given assignments and after learning the ropes I was given my own assignment. A Ms. Sara Edger wanted her cabinet doors repaired, easy enough.

“Ello miss” I greeted once she opened the door.

“Oh you must be the new comer” an elderly lady I took to be Ms. Edger.

“Yes miss” she nodded and closed the door behind me, then motioned me to follow.

“Ms. Edger is out right now. But told me that you were coming.” She told me as we entered the kitchen. It was spectacular; it was a fairly big kitchen with a sleek white counter. The cabinets were shining oak; I didn’t see what needed fixing. As if reading my mind the elderly lady pointed to a lower cabinet and opened it to reveal its hinges were falling out.

“I will get started” with that she left me to my work. Even in the finery of this place it felt desolate as if it were an abandoned house and not a fully furnished one. Light came in through a small window above the shimmering silver sink. The light made the tiles sparkle like diamonds. I thought this was supposed to be a small humble town. Guess you can be surprised any where you go.

After that day’s work, I went to the grocery store for Mrs. Jones. it felt good to get out of the house. i got to finally look around the town. passing by a elementary school, my mind traveled back to the days of being on the streets. when i would sit outside in a park across from a school and watch kids come in and out. they looked happy, what would it be like to go?

suddenly, someone bumped into me. turning around i see a small child on the ground rubbing her head.

"oh sorry" i picked her up by her armpitts and set her on her feet again.

"sorry mister" her voice was soft and sweet.

"kira!" thats when i heard her voice. i looked up and saw a beautiful woman run up to us. "oh i am so sorry."

"no its ok i was the one not paying attention." she smiled and i could swear the day became brighter.

"i haven't seen you around. you new in town?"she took the little girl's hand and looked up at me, making me see i was a head taller.

"yes i just moved here a couple of days ago. my name is ricardo.' i outstretched my hand and she smiled and shook my hand.

"well welcome ricardo, i'm ellena"

Author's Note

please leave reviews

Reviews

[Casper Cross]

You write with a dark tone that really grabs you and draws you in. I definitely would like to read more when you have it ready.
You should probably introduce the reader to the character near the beginning of the piece. One way you could due this (since it can be awkward to introduce a character in first person) is to introduce the character through dialogue. Someone talking to her and saying the main character's name.
You could also use dialogue to describe what your character looks like.
That's all I have... Nice work.

[TheSpiritGuide]

I enjoyed it. It felt a little cold not knowing the character's name. I liked the feeling you've created though, the desperation of life on the streets.

One small spelling error:
"There life was not easy" First paragraph, 'there' is supposed to be 'their'

Very good though, makes me want to read more chapters. :D