I Promise

Part two of Broken Again

It was the night of my friend’s birthday and I had had a couple of drinks. That was the first of my many mistakes that night. A girl took advantage of the fact that I was tipsy and came onto me right when Samantha was walking through the door. The instant her eyes met mine I felt my world crumble. The heartbreak in her eyes was enough to sober me up.

“Wait, Samantha!” I called after her as she ran out the door and I could hear her sobs as she ran from me. The sight of her running from me caused a panic to grip me in an iron hold. My legs moved as fast as they could and miraculously I caught up to her. I grabbed her upper arm but before I could utter a syllable, she slapped me.

I stood there stunned and holding my cheek. Neither of us had ever raised our hands at each other. My eyes met hers and I could see the regret and self-loathing on her face. She had not meant to do it but I was sure I deserved it.

I was angry at myself for putting her through this turmoil. Without a word, I turned and left her there. In my mind I knew I should not have left but I was afraid I would hurt her again. I would regret leaving her alone that night for the rest of my life.

In the last hours of the night I sat slumped in my run with an empty bottle of tequila as my only company. The effects of the liquor had started to leave me about an hour before. There was nothing in me but regret and my mind filled with thoughts of how I would show my face to her again after what had happened. I had to grovel to get her back most likely but I didn’t care because I knew she was worth it.

My cellphone rang and illuminated the dark lonely room but I didn’t want to answer. Fate would have it that I glanced at the caller ID and saw it was Samantha. My heart raced and I couldn’t reach for the phone fast enough.

“I love you” Samantha whispered in a drained and final voice before she hung up.

My soul left my body and before I could breathe another breath, I was out my window and sprinting down the road to her house. The only sounds that surrounded me were that of my bare feet hitting the asphalt of the road. Only the occasional street lamp illuminated my way but I needed no light to guide me, I could have made the same mad dash in total darkness. But I didn’t dwell on that or anything else. There was only one thing on my mind and that was that I had to get to Samantha.

There was something in my chest that told me that I would not like what awaited me when I finally reached her but I could not stay back. The finality in her voice was like a bullet to my heart that blossomed a pain that not even the physical pain in my feet could surpass. It seemed as if the closer I got, the farther her house became. Each ragged breath my body inhaled brought me a step closer until I finally crashed through her front yard gate.

A panic settled in my mind and the desperation to get to her caused me to slip on the front steps of her porch. The pain was irrelevant but as I got up I noticed her front door open which made a new fear race to my mind. With renewed strength and speed, I rushed into the house and began to call out to her. I didn’t care if someone dangerous was in the house at that moment, all that mattered to me was Samantha.

“Samantha!” My voice cracked as I continued to look for her through the house. I could hardly breathe with the panic that held me in a vice grip. Tears rimmed my eyes and blurred my vision but I couldn’t stop to wipe them away. As a sob nearly escaped my throat, I heard the faintest of sounds. I’ve never run so fast in all of my life as I did in that instant.

I ran the same path I had walked on our anniversary but this time waiting for me at the end was not blissful happiness. The morbid reality of what most likely awaited me caused me to run faster not slower. Her door was ajar and there was no light on indicating anyone was there but a pained whimper came from within.

As I rushed in I noticed everything in disarray but the one thing that caught my attention fastest was the figure slumped in the corner of the room. Her hair was a messy bird’s nest and her clothes were askew.

“Tam?”

Her voice was nothing more than a strangled murmur but I heard it. I was by her side and pulling her into my arms in a moment. The tears came as soon as I looked down at her arms and saw what she had done. There was no intruder, there was no one to blame but myself. Someone had hurt her and that someone was me. A darkness and hate began to take up residence in my heart as the realization of what I had caused came to me.

I had driven her to this and now the light of my life was being taken away from me. There was nothing I could do but sob and cry out to whatever deity would hear my cries to save her. Nothing but my cries of agony were heard through the house until she raised a weak hand and touched my cheek.

“I love you” She whispered faintly and smiled even as her life slipped from her body.

“Don’t leave me” I begged her with all my might but she only smiled tenderly

“Its okay” She said as her body began to lose its strength

“I love you” I finally told her as I cradled her body in my arms

“Don’t stop loving, please” She asked of me with a single tear sliding down her cheek

“I Promise” I swore to her as I watched her eyes slowly lost their light. My heart had just died and I was the one to kill her.

Over her tomb stone I stand every anniversary and repeat the same thing to her.

“I promise”

Reviews

[Susan14]

Sad story but is well written and captures the emotions perfectly

[Coyote Poetry]

A very sad story. The promises of love are forever. I like the set-up leading to the sad ending. You create situation and sadness in the excellent story.
Coyote