I hate you

     "I hate you." I told him. But I don't. I tell him it's true. I act like it. I ignores him. I make myself believe it. But why does my heart hurts so much? It pains me. What's this raging feeling when i see him with another girl? Who's that girl? I asked. Then to myself, I asked why I wanted to know? What am I? I'm just a girl, in the shadows, hoping he would lay his eyes on me. But he never did. I hate you. I hate you for doing this to me. I hate you for making me fall. I hate you for not catching me. I hate you for this. I hate you for everything! Why? Why? Why?! Why do I have to sit here waiting for YOU to come around? Why can't you come for me? Why won't you come for me? What am I to you? What is you to me? I don't know anymore. I truly don't know anymore..Why? I. HATE. YOU. YOU'RE THE WORST. LEAVING ME IN THE COLD. WHY ARE YOU MAKING A SCENE IN FRONT OF ME NOW? IS MY HEART BEING RIPPED APART NOT ENOUGH FOR YOU?! Am I really worth that less? My heart's shattered. Is it not enough? Is it not enough for you to let me go? To free me from this hell? No, not hell. At least hell is warm. This. Is a totally different story. So cold. Freezing. Alone. Helpless. Why? why? I hate you.
                    I love you.