The lonely girl

a little story , on a breeze

Caught inside a room full of fears 

lied down in  a bed of a million tears,

the lonely girl hides away from pain

keeping the world locked out

as her life swirled down the drain.

laying in a bed of a million tears, she sees no end to the pain;

walking that slow walk 

death is the only thing left to obtain.

wrapping that neckless around her neck with tears in her eyes

to the pain she says her goodbyes

but inher time of healing,she finds something she didn't expect,

someone with whom she can connect.

the two laugh and talk as they work to get healthy together,

they bond and grow so close, it's like they were held by a tether.

the lonely girl heals her mind, and make to her torture an end,

and finally she leaves with a best friend.

         THE LONELY GIRL IS NO LONGER LONELY!!

Author's Note

i honor your reviews

Reviews

[SmittyJas]

Lovely piece of poetry ringing in my ears lonely girl no more lets run and cheer she left loneliness behind to find a good man and a bottle of wine they share the joy of love missing from each others lives and there are bells rings and a family grows they let everyone know their love is true and they shall be happy ever after Till the end of time. Great piece of poetry written for the loneliest of lovers everywhere.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Beautiful piece.
I really loved this piece, the whole storyline was great.
Your rhyming is brilliant, only makes your poems better.
I like how this piece has sad, depressing emotions, but then a happy ending.
I mean who doesn't love a happy ending.
We all need someone to pick us up when we are down.
Or sometimes someone who can relate to us, when it seems no one else quite understands.
Really great piece :)

[Brave girl]

Thanks ,it means alot to me,especially this peice ... thanks again for reading my work =D

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Anytime :)

[paul4u]

My heart breaks reading this. Especially when i see your pretty smile. I do hope you smile more than you cry sweet girl. You do deserve it you know!

Beautifully written poem.

[Brave girl]

awwww thank you so much,it means the world to me =)

[Moon]

So sad, but the end has a kind of unique beauty to it. Great write!

[Brave girl]

thank you so much!!

[Moon]

No problem

[Bluefire]

She dies anyway? =o
I don't like that ending... But I do love the story twist in the middle.
I can see where this would make a great story or book.
Well done. ^^

[Brave girl]

it's life so it's gotta hurt a little,thanks for the review

[Bluefire]

True. ^^ You're welcome.

[Blogger]

This is inspiring! Very nice job.

[Brave girl]

thank you!

[misha]

What a great ending. Great job!

[Brave girl]

thank you...with a sad ^poem i thought it needed a bit of hope and joy at the end,i mean life is more than that,u gotta have a bit of everything :) thanks again Misha

[Sreenath]

i like the climax .... the end is superb :)

[Brave girl]

thanks ,i appreciate it :)

[ron]

A very happy end to a sad poem. I love how you took something so sad and made it into something possitive and happy.

[Brave girl]

the story of my life, lol! thanks for the review :)

[ron]

Your very welcome

[Prritiy]

a very nice bringing out positivity. liked it :)

one line i am bit unsure - ''the lonely girl heals her mind, and make to her torture an end'', 'make' seems somewhat inappropriate, cant it be changed to something more appropriate like wouldn't 'sees her torture to an end' be more correct.

best wishes.

[Brave girl]

thank you for your honest review :)

[Prritiy]

you are welcome :)