Sunset

Stars in the sky

Paper hearts ready to fly

Away, away

Into the night

Taking flight

Turning red tonight

Gone from here, from me

Distance where I can't see

Into the horizon

Torn into two pieces

And millions of creases

Abused and reused

Hope turned dark

Can't reembark

On life's journey

To save your soul

Taking the toll

Knocking me down

To the ground I fall

Feeling so small

So incomplete

Whatever happened to

Simply me and you?

I love you still...

Reviews

[Lorraine]

The phase is very abrupt what with the short line cuts, which I think is appropriate for such a poem. I love the way it's starts with nature feel to it, and then gradually diverting into romance. The development has a nice and fast flow.

Keep Writing. ^___^

[Amanda]

Aw. This is a great, though a bit sad, poem. Your word choice is amazing (I'm jealous, actually -blushes-) and...(I forgot what I was going to say....) Oh! Yes, you're good at rhyming, which is a very good skill to have. (I would never think to rhyme creases with pieces, or dark and reembark. That takes talent.)