Twisted Tree

Love is like a twisted tree
In the beginning it starts to grow
As the months go by it grows stronger
It soon reaches maturity
The tree is strong against the world
Illusion of invincibility vibrates from the tree
Soon time grows on

Wear and tear starts to show
Hardships warp the great plant
The exterior is rough and sharp
Its vibrant color starts to dim
Within it starts to rot
The tree dies

Author's Note

What changes would you make?

Reviews

[JENY]

Excellent…
But why didn’t you….tell anything about fruits and seeds…and new trees….that gives birth to….
Love too has that sort of consequences….
But loved your imagery…soooooooo….much…

[Bodhisattva]

Is perfect the way it is. This is one of those love that don't last but life is like that not everything last. I love the comparison here, very elegant. It is sad at the end.

[Chirinos20]

I find this poem rather Impressive. In theory I don't believe all love stories end like that but most of them do. Once you have found the one it might not end up or finish rotten. specially if a kid is born from such relationship. I always say kids are a blessing.

[Coyote Poetry]

i don't know. Trees are pretty tough. Few things can kill a tree. I been in the old forest where man have not cut down the beauty of nature. Trees like mountains touching the great sky. The poem is very good. Abuse and disease can kill a tree. Only true enemy to trees are the desire of man to cut down the great forest for un-necessary housing. A very interesting poem.
Coyote

[Poetic Beauty]

the flow needs fixed a little but the meaning of the poem is wonderfully done. The ending is very sad. I love many of the lines that you use to compare love and the tree together. It is a good write. maybe take a look at the flow. I think it is an issue with syllables but still beautiful.

[Joshua Donahue]

very nice and an excellent comparison!

[Bette]

well done

[deeps]

This is a very well written write i like this.