If I Believe

If I believe I can course my own life

and map the travels of my heart, can I truly?

The truth is what seems pure and crystal

in the visionary puzzles being pieced together before me.

 

What makes us stumble into bottomless wells of despair

created by what we deem as necessary crutches

in a crippling world of fanciful suffocations

and silky webs that ensnare?

 

If I believe that the norm is not my way

and I try to piece together my own path,

will I be rendered helpless by drowning in

poverty and societies wrath?

 

To live according to what makes our aging mental clock tick,

we must shun the confinements so artfully constructed

as a road to freedom cushioned by meaningless materialism

and fanciful tricks.

 

How young and childlike we must become to learn

about the essence of our being,

to wipe away the garish makeup that's pancaked onto the deception,

to laugh giddily and with innocent glee at the simplicity of how livng can be.

 

If I believe I know who you really are

under your devastating attempts to impress,

can I interfere in your process as you decide

what brings life joy and distress?

Reviews

[Levi Levin]

You did an excellent job! I love it:)

[Melody Telleria]

Thanks, Levi. I always hope to inspire positive comments.

[MandaBear]

I liked this one very much! One of my favorite poems! 100%

[Patrick Henry]

Beautiful example of where my own temporary philosophies bring me from time to time in thoughts that find themselves escaping more than they are exacting new rules and things to live and learn by. 6 stanzas, too!! I love 6!! lol So much of me, I don't know why, wants to "critique/share what I think of this poem, but it is easier said, by saying, "In your poem, you have covered the reason for me probably writing about half of all my poems"!! : ) Very cool..... xoxo -Mark

[Melody Telleria]

I loved your review! Sorry it took me this long to read it. Im glad that it made you aware of your reasons for writing, thats very humbling.

[Sacha Davison]

You use very powerful diction in this piece. It was a great read, I'm impressed! :) Keep up the good work!

[Jade]

I enjoyed how you have portrayed someone that isn't going to be anyone but themselves, will not change and the struggle that comes with this form of self strength, but that is just how i perceived it. Beautiful use of words, very intelligent.

[Melody Telleria]

Thank you for commenting that it reads as an intelligent piece, that's very humbling. It is quite the struggle to be someone whom holds on to their inner strength. Its so much easier to blend in and be overlooked and overlooked but its a beautiful challenge to be the mind in the crowd that inspires thought.

[Writer *78*]

Its true that we need to forge our own way in life. Being different is sometimes a gift and a curse by the society that we live in today. Your message I think is this:

"Embrace being different. Make your own way in life. For if you dont who will?"

Impressive work.

-Writer *78*

[Erinne S.]

This piece was so well done! I loved the turmoil mixed into this piece and the struggling to find a place in this world (my interpretation of it). I thought you did a wonderful job with it!

100/100 from me :)

~Erinne