Value understood (Chapter 2)

I tried to get up from bed, but my back ached and I fell back down. I looked beside me, Saleem wasn’t there, which meant he had gone to school and Seera was fast asleep. I just had a couple of more rupees to save for Saleem’s school fees and for this month’s rent. I put all my weight on the table as I got up from bed. It had been 3 am until Seera stopped crying from her stomach ache. I tried feeding her, soothing her, but nothing worked. I just held her in my lap until she stopped crying for good. I called out to Seera.

“Seera, Seera! Wake up! It’s morning, daughter.” No response. I tickled her on the hips and she bursted into laughter. “There. My beautiful daughter is awake.” I gave her a kiss on the cheek and went to the bathroom. I opened the tube for toothpaste, but there wasn’t much left. I took a slight portion of it and applied it to my toothbrush.

After brushing my teeth, I freshened up, lifted Seera and took her to freshen up as well. Seera and I ate bits of rice for breakfast and a dipper of water. “Eat up, so you can be strong and help mama when she’s old-” Three violent bangs swung on the door. Seera and I shrieked. “M-m-mama! It’s me S-S-Saleem.” What? Why would Saleem come so early from school?  I ran to the door and opened it. I pulled myself back in dismay. His first expression was severe and terrifying and to top it off, filthy clothes and a bloody forehead. “Oh my… Saleem!”

I tugged him inside. Before I could open my mouth, he started to talk.

“ Why - didn’t - you - tell - me - that - you -” he yelped in pain.

“That - you - asked - for - more - “

He dropped to the ground.

“Saleem! What should I do!?”

With all my effort, I heaved him up, raced to the room and placed him on the chador (bed), then I dashed to the kitchen and inspected the cabinets. All I found were bandage strips and cotton balls. I dabbed the cotton balls in water and placed them on a plate, took the bandage strips and tore them apart. More groans and moans echoed into the kitchen. I rushed to Saleem and slowly and gently, soaked the blood with the cotton balls. His body tugged around in disapproval. “Please… ma.... no- more!”

“No Saleem, just please stay still son, I know it hurts."

Seera shrieked as she looked at her brother. “Mama, look at Sallu!”

I brushed my fingers in her hair and gave her a kiss.

“I know Seera. I just wonder how this happened.”

After placing and changing Saleem’s strips, I dressed him into his other clothes and put him to sleep. As I left the room to check on Seera, I quickly went back in and decided to ask him something.

“Saleem?” No reply. “Saleem?” I repeated gently.
“Hmm?”

“How did this happen?”

He violently started to shake and cried. My heart beat fast. I got worried.

Something really bad must have happened for him to not tell me. What could it be? I thought.

“Won’t you tell mama what happened Saleem. Please… for my sake. I’m getting really worried.”

I rested my hand on his shoulder and he shoved it off.

“Why didn’t you tell me you asked the teacher for more time to pay my school fees mom? Why did you take my share of worries and dump it on yours mom?”

My cheeks flushed with embarrassment. “Let’s talk later Saleem. Good night-”

“NO! You wanted to talk to me. You can give me all those kisses and good nights after we’ve had our talk.”

“Don’t misbehave, Saleem-”

“I’m not! Stop treating me like Seera! I’m not 3 years old, I’m 12!”

I started to cry. “OK! That’s enough. The reason was because I didn’t want to disturb you. I didn’t want you not to go to school. Saleem… I need you to get good grades… train…  so you can grow up and be a famous athlet-”

“ I know! Athlete! Got it! But how? It’s been past 2 weeks, the amount of time YOU asked Mrs. Sheikh for my school fees? How will I study and become an athlete when I can’t even go to school?  Do you even have money, for either Seera or me? Or are you just expecting a teacher to understand all your worries-

I stopped him there. “Saleem! That’s enough. I understand that after father, you’ve been worried, but underestimating your mom…?  No matter, how much I try to be a good mom to you guys, you just put it down the drain!”

I left it at there. I slowly left the room, letting each tear, painfully drip down me. Saleem had never misbehaved with me, but today he did. Would Seera also develop hate when she gets get older? I thought.

I went to check on Seera. As usual, she played with her only toy. A stuffed bear I found when we moved into this house, which was 5 years ago.

“Seera dear… how are you?”

She looked at me, trying to mouth the words she tried to say.

“It’s okay, don’t stress it.” I gave her a weak smile.

Ever since I gave that toy to Seera , I didn’t buy her another one after that. I only spent rupees on the things which were essential for surviving this cruel world. My sewing business hadn’t been going too well, since my prices seemed too much for the customers. It was really hard to pay the rent. I had to borrow loans from my neighbors at times and couldn’t even repay them. There were tons of other jobs I could do. Maybe, being a maid, working at the market as a cashier, or even a cook! But they require me to go outside. If I go outside, who would take care of Seera? Wait! I could ask my friends from the neighborhood to babysit her for a couple of hours, while I work. But would Seera manage with them? Questions circled all over my mind. I didn’t make a decision yet. I decided to discuss it with my friends and… Saleem.  There wasn’t much of a point talking to Seera about this. I was just going to tell her once I made my decision. Aren’t you tired of this? Don’t you want a break? Rest on the bed for a couple of minutes? My brain said. I will definitely rest one day. But only when I would see a genuine smile on Seera and Saleem’s faces.

Reviews

[matrixmark]

You definately can tell the mothers concern for Saleem, and there was a nicely descripted piece about her rushing to the cupboards which I really enjoyed.
I had a great sense of mother/son bond when the mother asked with concern of why saleem had the blood on him. It was nicely done. The converstion which followed, flowed really, really nicely and was just like how a mother/son/daughter conversation would sound like. You painted the picture of the mother really clearly in the sense that she wold do anything for her kids becuase of thie nicely constructed last paragraph. If you read between the lines it also showed how exhausted she really was, but would battle on no matter what.

Another good piece.

Mark.

[heartspeaks]

mother is the only person who plays the role of father , brother , sister friend and everything. I missed my ammi when i read this . It was beautiful. words are great . writing point of view it is really nice. emotions are beautifully conveyed . i would give 8/10 for this chapter.

[Vasilees Sybissyl]

I really like the way you have written the dialogues, but I would appreciate some more descriptions. The end lines were really very very good. One of the best endings I have ever read. Keep it up!!

Love,
Vasilees.