Sleepless Nights

Sometimes you have moments in life, where you will feel completely and utterly overwhelmed.  The tense, tight feeling inside your chest slowly grows, and becomes so tight it feels you are gasping for each little breath. Times when it seems each and every direction you turn is the wrong choice.  You find yourself laying awake trying to get everything straight in your head, you try to write your mental notes of everything that needs completed, go over the past days events and reflect on what better choices could have been made to no avail. Just when you feel you have a plan,  blow after blow comes, knocking you back ten steps for each one you stride forward. At times, it appears there is no easy end in sight to the mess you call life.  Then the countdown of sleep begins...If you go to sleep right now you will only have 4 hours of sleep. Tossing and turning, stressing yourself awake even more. Ultimately, sleep overcomes.  Then you again find yourself awake in the middle of the night, frustration creeping in from exhaustion.  You go grab some water and in walking back to bed to try to find sleep again, your child sleeping through the crack in the door catches your attention.  You carefully crawl up on the bed and hold him and kiss him as when he was a baby.  You look down on that gorgeous face and realize that it is ok ...it is all gonna be ok. Everything you do, all of the struggles, decisions made, all of the hours worked, the sleepless nights, the exhausted days...they are worth it.  Every bit is worth it, if in the end you see that peaceful look on your babies face and you are finally able to sleep...