Salty Air

It's about my little part of Maine that I visit sometimes.

MAINE

I walk down the road.

Its name sounds like tuna.

There's a soda fountain this way.

I deeply desire an ice cream soda.

I walk down another road.

I believe it's called Old Orchard.

It goes to the beach, which goes to a pier.

I crave the famous Pier Fries.

Down another road of the crossroad I go.

I am not sure what it's called.

I'm walking to Palace Playland.

I long for the thrill of the roller coaster.

Now I walk along the last road.

Taking a left gives me a back road to Hewett's,

 and a breakwater on the ocean.

Here I yearn to spend my time eating  fish and seeing cats.

Author's Note

Do you know where they have pier fries? You know where this is if you do.
(EDITED)

Reviews

[Robyn]

this reminds me of the times i have visited maine! you brought back some memories

[blbla]

im sure people of your generation, and espically from your city/area where this poem is set will really enjoy it, however i think you could gain a bit more maturity to this poem by taking some words out, all the sentaces that have explainations of your actions could be abstracted, this would add a great deal more intrest into the mysterious ellements of the poem, EG - not knowing exactly where you are. i also think taking out some words would give the poem a greater sense of rythmn, a progress, a sense of traveling/walking.
i really like the repition in the final sentaces of each stanza, its clear that seeing certain objects are assocated with certain emotional responses and i really like the adolecent feel in that pattern, reminds me of being a teenager again.
i think with a bit of work, this could be a really great piece.
a great start!
ps -- constructive critisms shouldnt be taken as an insult, i dont mean to sound harsh or hard, i wouldnt be saying what i think you could improve unless i thought you had some tallent there! id really like to see how age and experence in your life will develope into your writing.
:) KEEP IT UP!!!

[Black Snow]

OOOOOOOOOOOOOKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK....Interesting...