Gone.

A rush of air, of energy
Flowing through my brain:
In one ear and out the other,
Just as my words fall on deaf ears, dear.
You’re seeing shadows
When the sun is high tide in the sky,
And I am seeing stars and staying up too late,
Waiting for you to grace me with your precious presence.
I am sick of everything this world has had to offer,
Except perhaps, of you.
Because honestly, oddly enough
No matter what, actions wrong or right,
Or falling neatly in between,
There is nothing I can do to quit you.

You are my drug,
I breathe deep,
You fill the empty places in my heart,
And being apart doesn’t quite feel the same.
The ever constant pain is fading, and I too,
Am fading without you here.
I am dying each and every time you refuse to answer.
I am trying, desperately trying,
Vying for a way to make you wake up
Out of your psychedelic mess up,
And see me,
Not the shapes revolving on the wall behind me.

Four hits of this, another one of that,
Just a drop in the proverbial hat,
And I have my head in the clouds
Looking for the point in the timeline
Where you had once lost it.

The vines are entwining,
And we’re twisting and winding
My hot pink sheets once more,
And your feet hit the floor,
And you’re gone, but still here.
Then you leave, for real this time,
Leaving your mind behind.

I am hiding in these sheets
And crying when everyone is asleep;
I am ashamed, I am shameful,
I am taking more pills.
Oh boy, this girl does have faith in her medicine,
Acetaminophen,
And you’re in swirling, twirling Eden,
Taking pretty little pills with smiling faces.
You may be growing big or you may be staying small,
But I can’t tell either way, you know.

I am searching for you, but you do not show,
Your face stays hidden, your eyes beneath your black hair,
A blank stare, an empty I love you,
A word or two,
And gone.

Reviews

[Larissa G.]

Hm. Well, it has wonderful potential and I almost let my recent experience bias my judgment. But.

It might be a little too long to really have a lot of power, because near the end I was losing focus.
Some of the sayings, the common ones? Those are a bit cliche. So if you go through the poem and see any words or phrases that are common, I'd try to replace them.
It isn't bad, though. :)