In the cold bus

She only managed an hour of sleep; but she  have to get up if she didn’t want to be left by her friends. Today, they will go to a resort. She told me that it was a place where humans go to every summer for a swim. A way to defeat the wrath of the sun. From what I know, when people go on outings, they were usually energetic; but she wasn’t. I don’t know what’s wrong. However, later I would know. I would always know. I just have to wait for her to come home and tell me everything.

I lay on her bed, watching her hastily put things on her bag. Then, she checked the contents. Shampoo? Check. Soap? Check. Spare clothes? Check. Everything was finally in order. She smiled at me and stroked my belly. Then she pat my furry head.

“I’m going now. See you later, Chobi.” She smiled at me again and left.

I stayed at her bed for another minute before her aunt scolded me so I was forced to go down. I spent the day sleeping and eating. Sometimes, I’d catch flies. They’re fun to go after because they fly super fast.

She got home at nine in the evening. Her limbs were sore from swimming. She was smiling �" seemed happy; but for some reason, I know that something was wrong. It was like she was trying to force something to go away. Trying to keep something in a box but it was forcing its way out. I don’t know what that ‘something’ was, but for some reason, it was sort of hurting her.

At dinner, she told us a summary of her day. They rented a van going there but they took the bus on going home. It was a long journey. She tried to fall asleep; but the bus was too cold and her limbs were too sore so she only managed a couple minutes of shut eye. Then she took the train. She kept on complaining about her limbs; but I know that it wasn’t the only thing that was hurting.

I always sleep with her in her room. The summer was too much for dogs like me who have thick fur and her room has A/C. When it was just her, me and the A/C; I finally learned that ‘something’ she kept on pushing away.

The resort was a giant compound with different swimming pools. There were for kids, some with a really long slide and one with artificial waves. There was one slide wherein people had to lie on their stomachs on a mat and would slide face first. She couldn’t participate, afraid that the wound from her teeth surgery would bleed. She told this to her friends, but they kept on encouraging her that everything would be okay and that she should at least try. She just kept on smiling at them and told them that she would just wait. One person, she told me, kept on asking why she couldn’t participate. She was caught off guard by the sudden inquisition that she wasn’t able to explain without stuttering. What surprised her wasn’t the questions but the person. He wouldn’t even look at her before. She didn’t know what caused the sudden interest. “Maybe it was for the knowledge of something new.” She said, smiling a little.

Then, there was this pool that resembles a river �" with current and all. They were given lifebuoys where they can lie and be taken by the current. She was sitting comfortably on her lifebuoy when the current was starting to take her away from her friends, she tried to call the friend in front of her; but instead, He took her hand and pulled her towards them. Again, she was surprised and all she could do was utter a small thanks while looking at the water. His hand was soft and warm, she told me. Maybe, He was a nice person after all.

I don’t know why she looked like she wanted to cry.

At the bus, she was seated with her other friend while He was first seated on her right but had to transfer at the back. Seated at the cold bus, she told me that was when she felt lonely and in pain. She told me she couldn’t understand why. But what she knew was that she just wanted to fall asleep and escape reality for a few hours. She didn’t know why it felt like a fifty kilogram dumbbell was sitting on her chest. Why it was like she was breathing helium instead of oxygen. Why she just wanted to jump off the bus and run as fast as she could. Why she just wanted to cry and cry and cry without people asking her what was wrong. She just didn’t know why.

In the safety of her room, lights out; with just her, me and the A/C; she fell asleep and I saw a lone tear roll down her cheek.

Master, why is it that every time you tell me a story that includes him, your lips smile but your eyes were sad?