so this is a very rough piece and something out of my comfort zone. I liked the rawness hence dared to post it. But I might modify it. There are many parts that need changes.
My Review
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I enjoyed reading this. Past, present and future may all be an illusion of the linear perception. Perhaps all things are connected and coming full circle but we can never see beyond the curve. If perspective is what we are lacking maybe we need the innocence of childhood to meet the wisdom of old age so we can all become children again.
i like Raw, moog-drika...
this poem speaks to me...the past mellows in our memory...it gets molded a certain way, to a certain truth we can live with...the bad not as bad, the good even better than it was.
there is someone i miss dearly...she probably knows...she is happy with someone else...
my high school sweetheart...youth, distance, school, several circumstances severed our relationship...even
though we stayed friends...one of those what ifs..but ironically there is still a good and close feeling there, i think for both of us...we never really had the chance for it to be a "negative past."
love this poem, AS IS....
Posted 4 Years Ago
4 Years Ago
wow, this is such an amazing extraction that you brought out of the piece. it makes me visualize my .. read morewow, this is such an amazing extraction that you brought out of the piece. it makes me visualize my write in a different way that too with a story incorporated in it.
I think past stays negative until we get to step on the present and future. no matter how much negativity is there in my past, now I adore having them thinking that those experiences were the reason that made me a little rational and my life interesting. It's no fun without roller coaster :D
Thanks a bunch for such a beautiful review :D
Interesting thoughts here and surely that's what matters, whether refined or raw., Was written that time
repeats itself because it never wears a watch.. simply: it can't, Is that why you say the following?
' Present, the future past fancied, appears, - it walks along with time, still current but in mellow shape. 'It holds past and continues to move...' Then you add of the Future, ' Ignition will have more breaks, -
some slices will be valiant vintage, - some smart semi-novelty, - some boisterous breakthrough.' So, eventually, if time actually stood still, would it be a mix of all times static, a muddle of time forever, nobody like yourself, able to analyse it and decide otherwise, I wonder. Hypothesis, yes but..
Times has fascinated and intruiged me for ages, no pun intended.. Yours is an intriguing and very interesting post, deftly written..
Posted 4 Years Ago
4 Years Ago
ahh I wish time could actually stand still. I hate myself to age every second.
But that's tr.. read moreahh I wish time could actually stand still. I hate myself to age every second.
But that's true too, if it would have happened, there would be a muddle of time, there would be chaos too. I really love the interpretation and questions you raised. It made me more curious to know about the mysterious aspects of time which I feel is never-ending.
Thank you so much for taking a ride to the write and putting your thoughts down.
So glad you like it :'D
Lots of love.
4 Years Ago
I do more than like it; this type of post really sets my often tired brain into some kind of action... read moreI do more than like it; this type of post really sets my often tired brain into some kind of action. Plus, as said elsewhere, Time has always fascinated me, tis one of those eternal mysteries. Take care, keep safe and.. will visit again very soon. Em
I love how your treatment of past-present-future (such staid old standards) is done with abstract freshness & unexpectedness. Often my complex vocabulary garners a complaint or two & it's great to read a kindred spirit who also loves complex words & ideas. I tend to over-manicure, so I do understand the weird feeling of throwing something out there without shaping it into a definite message or style. I love the nebulous nature of what you're getting across (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie
Posted 4 Years Ago
4 Years Ago
I actually love experimenting with complex words, and majority of my past works had that essence. Bu.. read moreI actually love experimenting with complex words, and majority of my past works had that essence. But in the middle I stopped adding them and went with the common ones because I felt it could be hard for my readers to connect to the write. Then again, I thought to experiment again and this is the result. haha
thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and for the positive words. It's actually a relief for me to know that i'm not the only here who loves over-manicuring.
I feel so better and encouraged now.
lots of love
Hi mugdha:) in the bones of this are some very lovely reflections I see what you mean about you feeling this is rough because the tones of this are a truly difficult subject matter to paint. this happens to me when I try to stretch my poems to an obscure and difficult reference. but in reading this I feel I get the gist and crux of your intents and they are very clever! if you still have need to modify this poem please send me a note so that I can reread it. Time is truly one of the hardest things to write about in my opinion! few things are of the nature of a distance and a contingency of succession and a constant at the same....TIME LOL
Posted 4 Years Ago
4 Years Ago
Thank you so much for all the positive words. Yes, it is indeed a complex theme to think about and I.. read moreThank you so much for all the positive words. Yes, it is indeed a complex theme to think about and I am working on it. I will surely send you the modified one once I am satisfied with changes.
Thank you so much
I read this again and again and each time I read it, it made more sense, giving me the satisfaction of finally cracking a jigsaw. And the last lines, 'future will look at the past and present to converse with time', so absolutely creative. Made me muse about the sheer beauty of such a realisation. Kudos to you.
Posted 4 Years Ago
4 Years Ago
I actually wanted that perplexed feeling from the readers. :D thanks so much for sharing your though.. read moreI actually wanted that perplexed feeling from the readers. :D thanks so much for sharing your thoughts. It really means a lot.
Hey this is Mugdha, a thought poker, a life giver of words.
I'm mostly into dark poetry and have a great appetite for reviving inanimate souls. I think they love me for this gesture but that's my pa.. more..