Apocalypse

She lights her cigarette
In the darkness of her room
The music plays so loud
Yet, she fails to hear the tune
And slowly she drifts away
Hoping for brand new day

Maybe then, everything will be okay

He lifts his empty glass
Drinking what does remain
The voices scream so loud
He just wants to escape
So he fills his glass over and over again
Until he is gone

Water falls from the heavens
The birds all up and hide
The sun doesn’t want to play now
The clouds eat up the sky
And there is darkness all around
As the water hit’s the ground

Maybe now, everything will be okay

Reviews

[Sunrise sky]

This is my favorite one so far, I am reading from the back.
I love the structure because it reinforces the meaning and makes the poem float...

Nat.

[Natalie]

This is good, and I don't like a lot of poetry. It has a natural rhythm and it's not so overburdened with descriptive words that you forget the point. Simple words masking a deeper conflict.

[Livana Lowell]

All, the switch of point of views and then the unison is very cute.

I love rainy days, they're so peacful and gives me the best ideas.

N'ways, like the longing for okay-days and good poem once again.

[Zombeh]

I love this poem, I especially like the two different sides that you showed, the man and the woman - what they're feeling. And then you continue from there. This poem felt so simple and easy-going to me [which may be weird...?] but I liked it that way. It was calm. Great piece :)