Chapter 6

The battlefield was quiet except the soft sobs of some of the remaining men on both sides. I was standing tired, blood stained and victorious in the middle of the field and fell to my knees crying tears of relief and joy and sadness. Sadness for the loss of the lives lost in the battle. Diarmuid was safe, though he was injured seriously and could not walk. He had a broken ankle.

　

The man whose wife had given birth before the battle had survived. Just barely though. His wife was so happy to see him come back alive.

　

"Oh my God!" She cried as she ran to cradle him in her arms. They lied there for a while just holding each other and crying happily. She pulled away after a while and stared smiling gratefully at him and then at me. " Thank you." she whispered amiably to me. Then, she brought out her beautiful baby girl to let her husband hold her for the first time. His face showed it all. That he felt like the luckiest man on Earth.

　

I had tears welling up in my eyes and I half-smiled. I knew then that I would never want anything more for a child of mine to have than both parents and a happy home. I would never want a child to grow up without their father. That thought made me almost run to join the family's happy moment, but I stopped myself and instead went to Diarmuid's tent.

　

"Diarmuid?" I whispered as I picked inside the tent. He was asleep. I smiled at his look of innocence and walked over to his cot. I let myself lay down beside his dormant body and I watched him sleep in silence for a long while before I too fell asleep.

　

When I awoke, Diarmuid appeared to have ended up being the one who watched me sleep. He was smiling at me, still laying on his side in that strange and cute way.

　

" Good morning sleepy head." he whispered in a hoarse morning voice. he was still

smiling.

　

"What are you smiling at?" I teased.

　

"Well at you of course. What else?" he started to laugh at me.

　

"Well, I don't know you just seem to be thinking of something a little distant. That's all." At that his smile faded and he pursed his lips.

　

"What is it." I pleaded for him to tell me what he was thinking about.

" It's embarrassing." he obviously wanted me to tell him not to say it but I was far too curious to stop him from going on. " It's just that I want you and me to be together forever and... I sort of wanted...never mind." I couldn't let him stop there.

　

"No tell me!" I pleaded. "I want to know.'

　

"I want a baby." he whispered his response. It shocked me and I pulled away from him, staring with wide eyes. A baby? Did he realize what he was saying to me?

　

"Whaa... now?!" I began to hyperventilate, but I stopped my quick-paced breaths the second those fingers wrapped around my cheeks and pulled me into a kiss that lulled me to a dreamy state. as it broke my tears welled up with tears and my face was hardened and red. i whispered something like, "Maybe, but not now." but I'm not sure, I couldn't help but break down and forget bits and pieces of that conversation. I remembered for the rest of this war this conversation and that kiss. It was different than the other times. More purpose in it.

　

***

　

days continued to pass. Tears were cried. Blood was shed, but mercy did not visit the soldiers.

　

The next few weeks were bloody and each fight took more and more of soldiers. Tears were cried, blood was shed, but mercy did not come to the rescue. Each man I saw die held a newly found sense of fear. Though I knew their fear before the battles, now the fear was stronger, more agonizing.

　

Day by day I wrote letters to the families of each soldier that passed. it killed a piece of my heart with each letter and opened new wounds as I sealed them shut. A piece of my soul seemed to go with each parting horseman that transported the death notices to the wives and children, mothers and fathers, sisters and brothers. I imagined how it would feel to me if a letter had been sent to me by a stranger on horseback, who gave not a care nor put sympathy in his routinely "I'm sorry." If Diarmuid had died in battle and the man leading the troops had the audacity to send some hopeless stranger to me with the news of his death I know I would evoke all of Hell and send the forces of darkness to destroy whoever dared lack the sympathy I deserved.

　

Lately I'd been spending a lot of time trying to go to the families to whom I sent letters and give a formal apology. I wanted them to know I wasn't a heartless, evil girl. I wanted them to know I cared and understood. We were having a break at the time. It was winter now and the troops were sent home to their families to attempt a proper Yule celebration. It was my very first Yule.

Reviews

[Mary]

haha a baby!!! well isn't it kinda sudden? oh well ^^ like it so far.keep writing!

[Zeitgeist Manifesto]

You wrote with amazing detail. I like you zoom so close into the scenes.
Great wrok here!

[chaotic katie]

kool can't wait to read more great chapter

[♥(heatherawesome..]

i love this and plz plz plz plz write more and i love it and you did so an awesome job and keep up the excellent work