Just Me

Trying to escape the past
But end up repeating it again and again.
This feeling is suppose to be one of pure bliss
But all it is to me is a representation of past pain.
All along I thought of myself as pathetic
Not worth enough to be taken in and loved unconditionally.

But someone showed me the truth
Opening the curtain of my mind and let the light in.
I'm as loyal as a dog that has been taken in for a time
loved for a while then abandoned yet again.
I gave my heart out over and over
Just to have it damaged and given back.

I gave it away to the wrong people.
I thought they loved me just for who I was.
I was wrong.

Though this time it was to a good boy
Kind hearted, honest and brave.
A leader that was easily recognizable.
It makes no diffrence.
I still want to give up before I let myself hurt more
...but I never really give up hope.
I can't help it.

I am made of hope;
It has played a big part in shaping who I really am inside.
I feel the need to share it
To give out something God gave me too much of..
But the more I give them,
The more they want from me.
A never ending cycle
Wanting more and more
Never satisfied
Then giving all I have
And being left as if I was never really mattered.
Never wanting the the person inside.
Never wanting just ME.