Savior To The World

For her, for you, for me, for the world...

 

Fresh off the phone, it's 5:42 AM. I need to be sleeping...it's the time for the dreams, the restless under the sheets tossing, it's time for the movies to play behind my eyelids. But, lucky for her, I am awake. Or, in this instant, was awake.

 

It started with a text. A simple plea for help. That's what I do. I help. Im a helper, Im a jokester, Im the f*****g March Hare. Yes, MAD WATCH! Fix it with JAM! indeed. I don't know how I do it. I just do it. I like the laughter. It beats the tears, it beats the needle in the arm when you're on your last corner of the road. Laugh is healing. I believe that totally.
So she laughs instead of cries. But I have to wonder, as I always do...what if she is lying through her teeth? Why do I ask? Because that's what I do. I can give the most genuine laugh and smile, and make the other person, or people feel they've done their job. Why?

Because I'm a people pleaser. She's a people pleaser too. She can't stand it to have someone mad at her. She's not one to take kindly to ill words.

 

So my job is thus. I get to play savior to her world. I get to paint pictures. Ugly, pretty, bleak, silly pictures so she could see that she's much more than what she sees. I get it now..."I wish you could see what I see Amber" Well....as Ive wondered just what he sees, she gets to ask me, and her other best friend what we see. And you know...like me, she won't believe.

My job is hard, it is long, the hours are s**t, Im always on call, no medical benefits, well...laughter and tears are very beneficial to the healing over ripped up souls I guess...but it is this. I do it out of love for her. Out of love for the kids....I do it to remind myself where I used to be, where I could be, and where I stand.

 

I stayed on the phone for a good 20 minutes....till I heard the Benedictine Monks. I laughed, and I hung up. Will she be okay? Yeah, for now she will be. Will I see her tomorrow? I have to. I told her that, in the words of Chris Rock, "Sometimes. Sometimes you just have to shake a b***h." That made her laugh.

 

I like playing the March Hare. Maybe I need to fix her mental watch with jam, and mustard, and take out the working parts to make it go wonky....Maybe I need to make her Happy UnBirthday cake...Or maybe. I need to hand her a mirror and tell her to look good and hard into it. Then she could see what we see, and that would make her happy.

 

 

Reviews

[bob, small b. aka invs]

this is a very good description of a very hard job. it reminds me of the fool in ancient courts whose job it was to entertain, but also to hold a mirror up to show the truth no one else would say. the fool was often the most wise. i admire anyone who has the ability to help friends the way you describe. i know it can be a thankless, wearing task. as far as the wrting itself goes, it's simple, but deep. nothing complicated about the vocabulary or metaphors, but they work so well there was no reason to be any more complicated. nicely done. i really enjoyed this piece of writing.

[Tara]

I think we could be twins. This is kinda scary. I feel like I could have written this. Are you a Libra by any chance? If only they sold those magic mirrors, huh? Some of the most beautiful people in the world think they are so unworthy.

[Doctor JKC]

A good honest belly laugh is the best medicine between
doctor and patient.
And they all lie. Why wouldn't they?
You can not help anyone. Please do not become a care-taker
for the misfits. They were dead by the time they were
3 years old.
Informing and educating a person about their difficulties by
getting the story straight is the best help ever and keeps you out
out the hopeless loop. Mental disorder is contagious. Set strict
boundaries or you are placing yourself at risk. Compassion is a
double-edged sword.
"make her happy."
You are unable to do that and know it.
I also consul you to be honest in your reactions
and statements. You have entered the world of
the doomed unless you get to the truth.
Like the Butthole Surfers say, " If you want to
know the truth, you must dig up Johnny Booth."
All my best,
Dr. Callaghan/Jack

[Fabian G. Franklin]

Oh, jam fixes lots of things; strawberry especially and chocolate can heal wounds of the soul. This was delightful!

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Any true friendship os worth sacrifices as long as it is a two way street, that was really a wonderful example of friendship... The was you told it really brought it to life.

[Alicante lullaby]

pretty,,,sweet and heart felt,,,your words were caring caress,,,

[Gandré]

I very much liked this sweet metaphor "it's time for the movies to play behind my eyelids".
And I like some others; also the style you wrote this - you made these confessions what you are (or believe to be / or your protagonist and this is - not what you want to be (as so often one can read), you are utterly honest with yourself. I like that. It is creating kind of sympathy for this story. A restless soul, seeking and exploring - this I like. I think, actually she is happy, she playfully can speak about the girls not happy with themselves, to write about insecurities is sweet; and I can learn from such writing and get a background when I'm judging myself (of course, just subjectively) ; this really gives me a feedback on myself. Also others are rebeller and we definitely need more individualists. I liked this!! Thanks also for your recent review, much appreciated.

[Forest Green]

Friendship, honest and true, written in words, thoughts, tones and tender smiles can form the lullaby that works magic on a wounded soul.

Thank goodness, thank God for those willing to be the connection, the voice, the heartbeat, on the other end of the line.