![]() I Think I'll Be ------ Today!A Story by Michael Stevens![]() Deciding which face to show the world today!![]() A comment received today got me to
thinking (quite the trick!) about the many-headed monster that resides in my
brain. What is it that decides what face
I'll show the world, what mask I'll wear?
Is it random, or do I decide? One
day it's comedy, and the next I'm comedically-challenged, seeing absolutely
nothing remotely funny about anything! Oh
sure, I'll tell myself to lighten up, but some days it's quite impossible, and
on those days I'll wonder if I'll ever laugh again; on other days hyena's and
me have a lot in common! People will
read something I've written, expecting Charlie Chaplin, and getting Charles
Manson (okay, that's an exaggeration;
but I do wonder about my sanity sometimes; no, not really!) It's a daily war in my head, a battle for
supremacy if you will:
******
"This is your ring side announcer,
Crocked-Nose Webber; in this corner, weighing in at 736 pounds, The Downer From
Depression City, wearing black trunks, Non-Smiling Mike! In the other corner weighing in at 178
pounds, The Laughing Hyena From Ya Shoulda Seena, wearing no trunks, The
Grinning Fool Stevens!"
******
"This is J.W. Flapper your radio announcer,
ring side, bringing you all the punch-by-punch action, sponsored by Binge Beer:
'Binge Beer; Sure, It's Not The Best, But
After A Few of These Babies, You'll be Well on Your Way to Crock City!'
Tonight's fight features perhaps the
greatest mismatch, at least on paper, in the history of the sport. Non-Smiling Mike has to be considered the
overwhelming favorite, weighing in at a whopping 736 pounds, while The Grinning
Fool Stevens is scrappy, I'll give him that, although is 'scrappy' enough to
deflect the crushing blows soon to be unleashed by a very mean, heavy
Non-Smiling? We shall see; both fighters
will now touch gloves in a display of sportsmanshi--what? Non-Smiling Mike just sucker-punched Grinning
Fool Stevens. Stevens is down! Surely (don't call me Shirley!) this is
against the rules, but amazingly, the referee has started his count.
"One, Two,"
If he's not up standing by the count of
ten, this fight is over.
"...., Five, Six, Seven, Eight, Nine,
Te--" Hold on ladies and gentleman,
Grinning Fool Stevens is up, and not only is he up, but he's laughing! He's openly taunting Non-Smiling Mike; oh,
oh, this is a dangerous strategy.
Non-Smiling is famous for having a nasty temper. Yes, becoming enraged effects his thinking,
but he more than makes up for it by unleashing ranks in a virtual rank-a-thon
blizzard of fury. Yes, Grinning Fool
will have to bob and weave something fierce
from here on out! Okay, both
fighters, having retreated to a neutral corner, are headed out once again to
resume the battle. Non-Smiling Mike is
screaming insults at Grinning Fool Stevens, who seems to be laughing at
Non-Smiling, and now both fighters throw a roundhouse right, and......' © 2014 Michael Stevens |
Author![]() Michael StevensAboutI write for fun; I write comedy pieces and some dramatic stuff. I have no formal writing education, and I have a fear of being told I suck, and maybe I should give up on writing, and get a job makin.. more..Writing
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