Dear Winifred; Mar. 12.

Advice (NOT good!) column

     Dear Winifred,  my son is afraid to go out of the house because of the neighbor bully.  After about a week of seeing him shy away from even the open front door, I finally asked him what was wrong.  After he told me, I confronted the kid and he let loose a string of obscenities at me and went in the house.  My son is 5-8, 160 pounds, and the neighbor boy is 6-2, and 230 pounds.  I can't blame him for being frightened; the neighbor boy is mean!  How would should my husband and I handle the situation?  Signed Intimidated

 

     Dear Intimidated, I take it Daddy wears frilly dresses and sings show tunes, so he/she would be no help.  Tell your son to grow a pair, man up, and the next time he sees the neighbor b*****d, haul off and send his head recoiling off the pavement.  If your son still insists on being Scooby Doo, the Scared Puss Dog, there's always the kick-him-in-the-balls-and-run-like-hell solution!  Winifred  

Reviews

[Bright Ocean Star]

lol! this is hysterical! I love the "Daddy wears frilly dresses and sings show tunes, so he/she would be of no help." Awesome! I'm just sorry it is so short! Thanks for sharing this one. I will be laughing about this all day...:)

[Michael Stevens]

Thank you for your nice comment. *Warning, the author is in no way responsible for any accidents caused by uncontrollable laughter!

[Goat]

Haha, "I bet Daddy wears frilly dresses and sings show tunes," I read that and died! I'm still crying form laughing so hard! I wish Winifred was real, but until that happy day, I will still come back to read your Winifred stories!

[Michael Stevens]

Thank you much; and Winifred thanks you too, don't you Winifred? Winifred? Yoo-who, Winifred? Now where do you suppose she's at? Oh yeah she's made up!

[Goat]

Nooo! My life is a lie! Winifred must be real, just like Harry Potter, right? RIGHT? haha.

[Michael Stevens]

Oh, excuse me, did I say made up? What I meant to say is made OVER, as in 'babelicious!

[Marie]

THe kid isn't ready for either of these solutins. I'd suggest a roll of nickles...

[Michael Stevens]

Ah, that's a great idea!

[Vidya Bacchus]

Yes I choose the "kick-him-in-the-balls-and-run-like-hell solution! " lol

[Michael Stevens]

Maybe I should be scared of you a little?

[Vidya Bacchus]

Yes Michael perhaps you should......BOO lol

[Michael Stevens]

Okay, I've been warned!

[Vidya Bacchus]

Ha yes you have lol

[Michael Stevens]

Only PLEASE don't hurt me, I'm actually a fragile sort, no matter what Winifred may have told you!

[Vidya Bacchus]

Seriously how fragile could you be Mikey with all those loonies loose in your head ?

[Michael Stevens]

Oh, you'd be surprised; I'm scared to death of criticism; it's better now, but I used to want to impress everybody; but like I said, now people named Mortimer I'm okay with if they are critical; next, it's people name Edmund; I know it's a big step, but gosh darn it, I think I'm ready!

[Vidya Bacchus]

Screw them all .Mortimer and Edmund .Who are they to judge you I say.U want me to kick them in the balls and run away ?

[Michael Stevens]

Would you? You don't know what a relief it is to hear you say that!

[Vidya Bacchus]

No problem .I'm on it lol

[Michael Stevens]

Thank you, oh thank you!

[Vidya Bacchus]

lol............:)