Haiku Hoodoo Two!

More haiku's!

 

       Haiku Hoodoo Two!

 

I am hooked on this

Five-seven-five rhyming deal

Crack cocaine in words!

 

Someone stop me; yes please

Can not stop disturbing thoughts

I need some help bad!

 

Before you think it,

Not in some perverted way,

Just words, if you please!

 

There once was this dude,

Considered quite a b*****d

Looking at him now!

 

Mirror, mirror, tells

Me of the awful, sad truth

That old man is me!

 

Forest draped in green,

Makes quite a few rich houses

Where rich b******s live!

 

One plus one is two

Unless you are a moron,

Then is minus five!

 

What the hell is that?

It is called desperation

No ideas left!

 

Skip, run, and jump high

Pole vault into your nice slacks

Athletes getting dressed!

 

There once was this girl,

Who always was late, so late

I’m still waiting here!

 

It has only been

Thirty years, give her more time

I think she digs me!

 

What do you mean; fool?

I aint a fool, so screw you

Think I heard her car!

 

Hard is the punch line

The joke?  Forgot how it goes

Hard is apropos

 

 

Three-headed Hydra

With three left feet can not dance

But he can breath fire!

 

Mythical beasts can

Spindle and mutilate you,

So you best beware!

 

 Have run out of things

For topics to make these poems

But does that stop me?

 

Reverse the charges

When you try to call me up?

Hang up on your a**!

 

Pay your money now

Drag your butt onto the bus

Crazy dude talks much

 

Hitting on a girl

“Hey baby, come here often?”

Told to drop stone dead!

 

Playing on the tracks

Fail to hear the train, too bad

Walk away legless!