Eleven

I still have the photograph

And every time I see it I wonder

What did you see and,

           What did you feel when you saw my new face?

Did you imagine the future I have now,

            That it would be almost devoid of you?

 

Because of you?

 

I used to believe you absolutely adored me,

       Would do anything for me,

          And would do whatever necessary ,

To be a part of my life.

 

Until you stopped trying.

 

My existence has been influenced by you in so many ways.

        From the color of my hair,

             to the talent I base my value on.

    I cannot deny that I am your daughter.

 

I doubt you would notice.

 

When I was little, we’d watch old films

                                      And silent ones.

You called me Chuck, and took me for walks

           Just because it was Sunday.

 

Chuck is not a girl’s name.

 

Last night was the first time I cried

  Just because you were so far away, since I was 11 years old.

            It is not as if you abandoned me,

            You just check in every once in a while.

 

Amplifying our growing distance.

 

I am not saying I think you should have stayed,

   But you still could have been my Father,

                       not a hug and a phone call.

    And I would be your daughter,

                        not an obligation.

 

 I will always remember how it was,

      How you were, that last day.

 

I love you, and I miss you,

But some part of me will always be,

                11.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

I know I am not the best writer, and this is not my best either. But I haven't written anyting in a while, and this is what i was thinking about...

Reviews

[Last Lying Look]

I loved this piece. It was captivating in a sad way. I just couldn't stop reading it.
The last line was really... I don't know... it captured me.
"I love you, and I miss you,
But some part of me will always be,
11."
This was so sorrow filled. Such an incredible write.
Amazing. I'm just sure why but I really r e a l l y like this poem.
I'm adding it to my favorites.

-Elissa :)