Time

The ache.
When nothing goes as you wanted it
And the world is crushing your voice,
Your sense of self.
You feel vulnerable and alone.
Muted by time

Everyone around you seems ok,
That time goes on,
That things go on.
Move on.

Even with the smiles
And that ache behind your eyes before everything gets hazy

Will time pause just for a moment?

And the sex
And the hope
And the distraction.

Time goes on
Even when we don't want it to

Why should it listen?
Why should time stop for me,
When it doesn't for you

But could it take a break?
So memories didn't have to become memories so quickly

Reviews

[Justice Smith]

I like how you added not only the mental and emotional aspects of relationships that become memories, but also the physical. And how you use ache as a metaphor for the pains that is caused by time is quite impressive to me. I've never really thought about how the pains time causes us could be related to an ache. Something always there. Maybe more or less at different times, but there nonetheless. I really like this poem in general. Great job Molly.

[TLK]

The use of 'hope' is in a brave context here. Hope yearns for a tomorrow, and thus is a slaughterer of the present moment. I do not know much about Buddhism, but I suspect that some would say to cultivate compassion and contentment instead.

Also, of course, hopes can be dashed, and therefore are not a solution for all ills.

This poem seems to me to be about giving up hope in regards to time. You are left with just one question for entropy itself: could you pause? You don't even want it to unwind. You just want that extra moment to luxuriate in your memories.


This doesn't quite have the aching simplicity of your "The Meaning of Life", but I can't say it's too far away. You do not go for ostentatiousness, so style does not blot the view. In that case, the simplicity aided the reader to re-read and discover hidden depths. Here, the simplicity leads to clarity so that the question present can be fully acknowledged.


I am glad to be here with you, thinking of the same problems.

[Molly]

Thank you, I appreciate all of your comments