Corona

The boys I’ve kissed

I can count on two hands and one foot

Sometimes I know their names

Sometimes I don’t

And I can’t tell you how many times

I’ve kissed a boy

Because “he seemed nice”

And I owe him something

For his alleged chivalry

There was my boyfriend, of course

Bright eyed and 16

Playing games of spin the bottle

But I didn’t really like him

I just didn’t have the heart to hurt him

So I went through the motions

Then there was a series of Catholic school boys

Who were bred to know the right things to say

And the right drinks to make

There were the boys from concerts

Three boys on one cruise

Prom dates

College parties

And each one took a piece of me

Each one broke my heart

Because each one was supposed to be different

Ironically,

The boys I’ve fallen for

And I mean really fallen for

I’ve never kissed

Because they would take all of me when they broke my heart

Granted,

There’s only been three of those

And they’ve all been my best friend

And my heart hurts to think about

How much they’ll never love me

And when I remember how destroyed

They used to make me feel

It hurts as if they were rejecting me for the first time

But how could they not

I’m innocent but easy

I’ll believe anything from anyone

Whether I’ve known him five years

Or five minutes

I self-destruct with Coronas and flattery

Small-talk and the way he touches your hair

I’d much rather fall in pretend love

Than risk the real thing.

Reviews

[Clara]

To love is to be vulnerable.

No matter how much pain we endure, it is amazing how we also have the capacity to heal.
The real thing is worth the risk.

[Molly Garnet]

Lola, that sounds so lovely. But it's way too terrifying and I would never even know when the real thing was there.

[Coyote Poetry]

"I’d much rather fall in pretend love
Than risk the real thing."
I tell the young people. Travel, have fun and test life. I understand this poem. If we give all. Part of us will be lost. I look back in time. I wonder if I understood love. The above lines of your are a safety measure. Love does cost and can hurt. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Molly Garnet]

Thank you for such a thoughtful review.