i'm drumming, go to hell

A Poem by Mohl083

trying to awaken the sleeping drunk

if that damn low ink warning
on the bottom right of my screen
doesn't stop popping up at random
i'm just going to throw the printer out the window
and give everyone handwritten notes
on napkins imprinted with a coffee mug's a*s.

and i hate by the time i actually muster enough courage
to look in that mirror again
i've already forgotten the tears
with sober rage and drunken jubilation.

i wish i could write with the fervor i did a decade ago.
just a kid and a beat-up notebook.
a soda can crammed into the side of the bed
where i'd ash my minimum wage cigarettes
it was new and it brought joy singed with hope,
but now it's just something to pass the time.
a duty i made a halfhearted allegiance towards.

she comes back to me sometimes
but by the time i realize it's a dream
we just sit there looking at each other
until i wake up.

i'm kind of sorry sometimes
depending on the mood i'm in.