after vacation

my last couple of days

a cold miserable day

with nothing but photographs

to help keep me warm.

pawn shop dvds rotate through the player

while warm beer flows in my gut.

i boot up facebook

and instant messangers

hoping to find an old friend

who might help me waste a couple hours.

i ponder strumming a plastic guitar

to a rainbow symphony

scrolling across my tv,

but the thought of not being able

to pluck silver strings

half as well as i mash colored buttons

pisses me off to no end.

a six year flashback hits me,

and i'm confronted with a nameless tombstone

i could always wring a few tears out of;

however, they are increasingly rare...

a few black names fill up my list

before i tab down to the mountains of grayed out handles

from people who've graced my life in the past seven years

like a random kiss in the rain.

i was looking for her,

apparently she was looking for me,

so i guess the only question left is

what does that mean?