back on track

cleaning out the cobwebs, first one in awhile. damn, you still look fine...

about a month

and a couple thousand beers ago

i locked up my brain

with the little lock i purchased at Lowes

and sailed off over the horizon

in my schooner of freedom.

At last, when the final drop of ale was licked from the keg,

Njörðr crawled up from the waves

and rushed my tiny vessel to port.

The voyage had left me with salt on my tongue,

and the sweet smell of grass

made me vomit,

So I collapsed in this valley

and dreamed of large breasted mermaids

who would salve my burns

with ancient ointments

passed on from beings

who had long ago grown legs

and wandered out of the sea forever.

While trapped in this beauty,

Nerthus came gliding over the mountain

atop her great two headed bird.

The beasts' shriek shook me from

the oceanic dream of lust

and carried me home to my forgotten woodshed.

The shiny new lock

was now rusted and decayed

and crumbled to dust at the touch of my fingers.

Inside the dank tomb

sat my cereabellum

relaxed in  a makeshift recliner

scarfing down potato chips

as he starred into the darkness.

With the creaking of the door,

He turned his eyes to address me

and lamented,

"I'm bored with it all."