What I learned in College

since i just realized i'm going to grad-school, it's good to poke fun and the waste of time that is undergrad

 

Some place in the center of the earth

Living in a crude, makeshift house

Carved from the magma and rock

Resides a little man in an emerald suit.

If you’re lucky enough

To walk out of your body

He’ll send you a postcard

With a beach at sunset on the front,

And hurriedly scribbled on the back

Detailed directions to his place.

It’s easy to get there

All you have to do

Is Jump.

Don’t mind the bones

Shattered on the canyon floor below

They were never really you.

Eat the bread coated with sesame seeds

Gulp every last one down

Careful not to miss any, Ok.

Congratulations, now you’re pregnant,

But not with some cheesy human baby

You could sell for a truckload of cigarettes

On the black market.

Prop those legs up

And shoot the life out.

The blue and green marble

Floating around a ball of fire

Just chilling there,

With no particular place to go,

All that is yours, Good job!

There are too many cats

Not on fire.

Block X Rolls down an incline of 35 degrees

But is stopped by the Treaty of Versailles;

However, Hemingway is drunk

And fighting a bull.

Think about the possibilities—

You have 30 minutes to write your thoughts…

Excellent Work! Plus 5!