Fading Love

 

“For he would be thinking of love
Till the stars had run away
And the shadows eaten the moon.”
― W.B. Yeats

 

Two shadowy silhouettes were making their way through the winding alleys bordered by mighty pines and chestnut trees, trying not without difficulty to get to the golden forest of wandering leaves that spread above the little town, enclosing it.

“Why did you put on these high heels? How did you expect to make it up to the top? What were you thinking huh?”

He scolded her in a somewhat playful tone while dragging her by the hand and looking upward, towards the cloudy skies that seemed to swallow the mountain peaks rising every now and then among the white smoke.

“Well, I wanted to look nice”, she mumbled staring at her favourite Oxford-style pumps that now made it impossible for her to climb any further.

“C’mon hey”, he insisted pulling her slowly by the hand. “Let’s go.”

“I can’t, I want to rest a little.”

“Great”, he said. “You are one hell of a hiking companion, you know.” He sat down next to her under an old pine tree and took her hand in his while she laid her head upon his shoulder.

Soon small drops of rain covered their hands and she looked at him and smiled. “I love the smell of rain and pine.” “Me too”, he whispered and he kissed her softly on her lips and all over her wet face.

“Let’s go home”, she said.

They got up from the damp earth and started running in the rain that at that moment started falling even harder.

They reached a gate which gave way to a large garden and they walked on the narrow stone path until they entered the door to the house. It was a beautiful old house with antique furniture and wooden floors that were making cracking noises as you stepped on them. It was somewhat dark inside even though it was still daytime. After they got undressed he went and got two crystal glasses and filled them with over ten years-old Merlot and she lit the scattered candles that were lying oll over the floor. He laid his head in her lap and she started caressing his hair and kissing him on the lips. The rain was dripping across the large, stained-glass gothic windows and the sky was slowly turning into a dark, leaden gray.

“This is all I ever dreamed of, being here, with you… the rain… the mountains…”

“The wine”, he smiled.

“Yeah… everything else seems so far away doesn’t it. This is what happiness is like to me. I love you.”

“I love you too”, he said.

“This is so easy isn’t it. No more tormenting nights, horrible nightmares, vain hopes, endless searching, fears and that gnawing maybe-I’m-not-good-enough-for-this feeling. I feel like I don’t have to prove anything anymore, like I can be me at last.”

“I know, it does feel easy…. Why does it feel so easy now?”

“You know, I would love to take you by the hand and show you all the places where I suffered, all the places where I’ve felt lonely and scared. And we would look at them detached, like two ghosts that came to visit from another world, and we’d be relaxed knowing that nothing can hurt us anymore.”

“You make being a ghost sound nice…”

“Well I wanted to be one once, before I met you. I thought it would be the only thing that could save me.”

“See that’s what I love about you, your optimism.”

“Well, I don’t want to be one anymore.”

“Good”, he said and held her head in his hands while pressing his lips violently against hers, biting them. She felt a pleasant warmth overcoming her and a tingling sensation ran through her entire body while tears started streaming down her feverish face.

She wiped her tears as she glanced through the windows of her train compartment. She could only see some lights flickering in the distance over the dark fields and the reflection of her fellow traveller, a haggard looking old man who looked rather curiously at her. “Are you ok, miss?” he said. “I’m fine, thanks”, she answered as she forced a fake smile, then turned her gaze again at the distant lights disappearing in the night.