I loved the inspiration behind this poem, I just feel compelled to comment on the lack of punctuation, that would really make it much easier to read. The flow is often broken up by having to stop to decide where a sentence ends and another begins.
But, I did like this poem, especially the lines:
"Grounded and made to last / The essence of present and past / This is what I want to be / Who will teach me?"
I have made the requested changes. Please reread and let me know if it helped. Thank you so much for.. read moreI have made the requested changes. Please reread and let me know if it helped. Thank you so much for your review.
12 Years Ago
The flow really is much better now - it's easier to concentrate on the message behind the words, rat.. read moreThe flow really is much better now - it's easier to concentrate on the message behind the words, rather than the punctuation. Great piece of work. ^_^
I loved the inspiration behind this poem, I just feel compelled to comment on the lack of punctuation, that would really make it much easier to read. The flow is often broken up by having to stop to decide where a sentence ends and another begins.
But, I did like this poem, especially the lines:
"Grounded and made to last / The essence of present and past / This is what I want to be / Who will teach me?"
I have made the requested changes. Please reread and let me know if it helped. Thank you so much for.. read moreI have made the requested changes. Please reread and let me know if it helped. Thank you so much for your review.
12 Years Ago
The flow really is much better now - it's easier to concentrate on the message behind the words, rat.. read moreThe flow really is much better now - it's easier to concentrate on the message behind the words, rather than the punctuation. Great piece of work. ^_^
I really enjoy nature in poetry. You have taken a deeper look at the weeping willow tree. There is so much to learn from nature. Lovely poem!
Posted 12 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
I love your writing and style, it's mysterious, deep, and pure.
If you breathe her tears, and feel the fresh oxygen and water mixed with life salty prickles, also through her sorrow... indeed, the gift to achieve the weeping willow will... oh my such a well thought out poem, with your strength woven through it. Goes into my favs!
I thought it was graceful to be honest. It was a perfect kind of poem...one that engages the reader and honestly for me it reflects my own style because a lot of time my poems are more like fragmented thoughts. ^^*
To really truly believe in your dreams and make them come true… you must not first believe in yourself, but be prepared to prove your doubts and fears wrong.
To know giving up is not an easy .. more..