RAW

Raw

Eluded, our mind’s become, while we lick our wounds of past regrets, replaying painful scenes of misery over and over again, until we successfully relive it, one more time, finding a sick sense of comfort in it. Comfort in a false illusion that we are, what they made us, because of their cruelty and unthinkable ways, we are trapped inside what we are today, unable to break free from wounds that are unable to heal, wounds fresh and raw still. Raw from our constant unthinkable act of tearing back the new flesh trying so hard to rebuild upon a constant oozing wound made fresh again, over and over again, by no other than oneself, trapped in an eluded thought, wounded, raw unable to heal! Raw by choice, raw by our twisted ways!

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Manda]

This piece was very emotional and that is obvious in it's vocabulary. But I feel the subject of the poetry does not necessitate run-on sentences. It feels like it needs audible breaks that are not conveyed well with the punctuation. Try splitting up these sentences into lines, making it easier to read and still maintaining that strong sense of emotion.

[Kimberly "Melody" Carney]

first attempt at a prose. I will work on it. Thank you;)

[∠( ᐛ 」..]

Really good and its enjoyable to read.
100/100

[John Alexander McFadyen]

OK it was GOOD and interesting and made me read easy from start to finish. Just too much use of the word raw had me raw by the end!! xxx

[~]

Soooooo true. I have found we keep peeling back the skin until we are ready to let the freaking wound close on its own. Those wounds can be so itchy, you know? It is all part of the healing process. We HAVE to scratch at it until we are ready to stop focusing on it. Excellent work on this, poet.

[Pencrafter]

Your poem elicits an uncomfortable feel, preventing the enjoyment of life. Our perception of the world we live in is influenced greatly by our basic attitudes. Sure, we experience lots of pain and frustration. We deal with it the best way we can, then move on.

[Coyote Poetry]

Artwork and words were amazing. The emotion and desire gain life and action with the powerful description. Thank you for sharing the excellent poem.
Coyote

[Loner]

Wow!
A real raw treat to have read a poem like this.

[Patricia B. Hepler]

When we get comfortable with our pain and grief, it's hard to change our views since we fear the unknown~ Your expressive poem is powerful. ~ pat

[ShadowFaux]

I like it, i think mind's does not need the apostrophe? and the end seems a little excessive with all those !!!! but it's very good. Sometimes the human condition is a very dark and kind of self-destructive thing.

[Sheila Kline]

Yes, we must first forgive ourselves to heal, but this often so much easier to know it is what we need to do, rather than actually extend the measure of mercy needed for self healing. Your write makes one stop and think of how detrimental self abuse is!!

[MOON]

Poignant write , like the demons in the mind we are trapped by our thoughts. Lovely.