RAW

Raw

Eluded, our mind’s become, while we lick our wounds of past regrets, replaying painful scenes of misery over and over again, until we successfully relive it, one more time, finding a sick sense of comfort in it. Comfort in a false illusion that we are, what they made us, because of their cruelty and unthinkable ways, we are trapped inside what we are today, unable to break free from wounds that are unable to heal, wounds fresh and raw still. Raw from our constant unthinkable act of tearing back the new flesh trying so hard to rebuild upon a constant oozing wound made fresh again, over and over again, by no other than oneself, trapped in an eluded thought, wounded, raw unable to heal! Raw by choice, raw by our twisted ways!

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Manda]

This piece was very emotional and that is obvious in it's vocabulary. But I feel the subject of the poetry does not necessitate run-on sentences. It feels like it needs audible breaks that are not conveyed well with the punctuation. Try splitting up these sentences into lines, making it easier to read and still maintaining that strong sense of emotion.

[Kimberly "Melody" Carney]

first attempt at a prose. I will work on it. Thank you;)

[Jess.]

I just love this! Every single line. Speaks the truth, as sad as it is. I like the way you just laid it all out. Nice.

[Manpreet]

This is one nice piece!

[Kes]

This is amazing. Love it, love it, love it. :)
K

[deepblue04]

oooh! I love it!!!

[Bewitching Sensations]

Just stop for awhile.. sometimes in our attempt to heal, we dont hear that small voice, alot of the time it is something simple that will bring healing to our souls.. but we are so busy we dont hear it.. hope this helps :) nice piece

[Kimberly "Melody" Carney]

I do not write always about my personal feeling, but place myself in anothers shoes that I have watched. This is not about me. Thank you though for your words

[Bewitching Sensations]

:)

[Mr Dunne Poetry]

This piece is so emotional. I can feel and relate to every word. Well done. Mr Dunne.

[Bobbie Coelho]

My goodness, this is sad! It sounds as if you were very when you wrote it, but I appreciate the passion and feeling that went into it. It is a good poem, but not my cup of tea.

[Rene Velez]

nice work, this resonates within the soul.

[J.L Hunter]

The flow in this piece was absolutely breathtaking. It was different and thats what I think made this good for me. It sounds like a piece of writing that kind of preludes some epic story. Very good.