Inside the Mind of a Little Girl: Tacit systems of Conduct

For those who have received a read request for this story: I realize it is a bit long, so I do not expect any quick response. However, when/if you have the time, I would appreciate your comments :)

She lifted up her chin to reach above the surface of the table, just big enough to succeed, to get the best view of the world. She was proud that she was finally such a big girl; she had a real chair like all the adults. Lifting her little arms up high to reach the plate and inhale the last of her ice cream. She had already opened her mouth up wide to prepare for that last bite. She was very ambitious in her own way, always left her plate empty, and strived to make, especially the last bite, a perfect balance between the different ingredients. A perfect amount of ice cream, chocolate sauce, whipped cream and nuts balanced such that not one was too dominant in proportion to the other. Also, she went for a big finish. The last bite had to fill up all of her mouth to make sure that every inch of it would be happy and not wanting. She was very fair like that. 

In addition to being fair and thorough, she was fast too. After finishing dessert she sat and watched her sister intently. She didn’t miss a single movement of her sister’s spoon going up from the plate and into her sister’s mouth. Eventually impatience caught up with her. While she was fair in general, she was slightly annoyed by the fact that her sister wasted a good portion of her ice cream. Her sister ate the ice cream so slowly that some of it melted. Her sister didn’t fully appreciate the wonder of sweet things. Once she was done eating ice cream and someone else might offer to eat her leftovers, it had melted and was no longer ice cream. Perhaps distribution should not be equal but according to need? - At least in regard to ice cream.

Wiggling her toes in a mixture of impatience and excitement (she was very good at wiggling her toes too), she watched out for any sign that everyone at the table was done eating. As her sister laid down her spoon, the little girl quickly jumped from the chair, thanked her parents for dinner and ran into the living room eager to watch cartoons.

A little while later, her cartoon time was interrupted. It was 7pm and her father always watched the news at this hour. Not to worry, she could play with dolls or Lego or just use her imagination. If necessary she could play with things from the cupboards in the kitchen or stones from the garden. She was very economic in her approach to the resources available to her - nothing was wasted. A stone could function both as a mark of a door entrance AND a doorbell. The terrace was the house, her dad’s workshop a factory, the vegetable garden was a farm, living room a day care centre for the dolls. Sometimes the factory would turn into a mechanic shop or a fortress, the farm into a mini-put forest, and the house into a traffic area and so on. No reason these transformations couldn’t occur within the same game. This is not to say that her games and locations were random. There were rules. These were not obvious to most people but to the intent observer there was a system. Sometimes the game and imagination would run amok and the rules might be broken. To remedy these mistakes there was another system that allowed her to rectify the breaking of the rules or at least make the consequences benign.

Sometimes playtime was confined to a much more humble space. However, this was not a restriction. On the contrary, it was a welcomed challenge that fed the imagination. She could sit in one spot and play for hours. In fact, sometimes she preferred playing in confined spaces where she could be the sole authority of which direction the game would head. Playing by herself was much more satisfying in general. She liked other children - at least some of them. However, it was a bit up hill at times, as she didn’t always get why everyone continuously wanted to play house, nurse or some other specific scenario mimicking real life situations. Where’s the fun in enacting something that most people do every day? It was okay but not all the time. She liked to think herself somewhat of a pioneer in the realm of playtime - at least in her own community, which consisted of kindergarden and a few children living down the street. Although, her network was relatively small, it should not be underestimated. It took a lot of discipline to maintain these relationships and was a most exhausting task.

 

As years past and the little girl started school, her community expanded. She was out there experiencing the real world. Excited with lots of expectation to what this new world had to offer, the little girl took the first step into the school yard. Perhaps a little nervous as well, her second step was hesitant and she could feel her heartbeat rise, although on the outside she seemed perfectly calm. It was as scary as it was exciting.

There were lots of other little people talking and throwing themselves about the room, making their existence known. She just stood there wearing her new school bag with her arms stiffly pointing diagonally towards the floor as if glued to the sides of her body. What was she to do next? Should she just stay put or should she join the other kids, who either nervously or impatiently kept moving around, swinging a leg back and forth, leaning on a parent or lying on the floor. Suppose there was no one right thing to do? She was shy but determined to show that she was a serious and responsible 1. Grader. After the parents had left, the children were to sit in a circle and sing songs. As it would turn out singing was to be an everyday occurrence in the field of school, along with a reasonable amount of playtime and other activities that may differ from each day.

The little girl was not entirely sure what this school thing was to amount to. Since the teacher had the right answers and behaviour, surely she would be the one to emulate? Or was there some hidden agenda and knowledge that she didn’t understand? After a few days the little girl had observed that the teacher always had her legs crossed when sitting in the circle singing. The teacher also had a book she liked to look at when singing. The book seemed important. The little girl always made sure to sit next to the teacher in the circle with crossed legs, looking over the teacher’s shoulder peering onto the pages of the book. She couldn’t read the text, she was familiar with the alphabet, she could write her own name, her sister’s name, her mother and father’s names. However, her skills were not yet sufficiently cultivated to enable her to read the many words in the book. It had some nice drawings though. She liked drawings, she liked books also - and the stories she new by heart! She also liked singing, though never while peering into a book.

The little girl enjoyed living in her head, but liked to visit the material world and its strange customs. It was fun and interesting to watch people. She was curious and liked to learn. However, some things remained a mystery to her. 

Author's Note

Constructive criticism and suggestions are well received!

Reviews

[Jamestown]

You really sucked me in with this piece, It really took me back to my childhood
and the little corky things I used to do as a youth! I too would always want to be
close to the teacher and loved books, so I got a giggle out
of that description. The innocents in being a child is so beautiful,
I'm actually writing a piece that focuses on it! Really enjoyed reading this and thanks
for sharing! Keep up the great work and b-blessed!

[Mai L Nissen]

Hey JT! Thank you for your kind words. I am glad that you found the story engaging :)
Let me know when your piece is ready for reading!

[A. H. Pinley]

As well as fair and thorough she was fast too. (The wording doesn't flow smooth in this sentence.)
Her sister didn’t have a very (strong, dominating, commanding, et cetera...) sweet tooth,
Kinder Garden= Kindergarten
She just stood there with her new schoolbag still on her bag and her arms straight down glued to the sides of her body.(?)
A fun story through the eyes of a kid! We as adults forget what it's like being a child. Imagine your world starts out small and then you start school and then all of a sudden your world grows ten fold. Scary...

[Mai L Nissen]

Thank you for pointing out sentences that need more work, I see your point and will definitely try to improve these. I appreciate you taking the time to read and commenting! :)

[Not here]

this was a really descriptive and you are good at getting people to feel what the character feels. great work!

[Mai L Nissen]

Thank you for your kind review, David. I appreciate it :)

[Jennie Baron]

It made me remember the joys of childhood, the innocence, and the mystery that you speak of in the last paragraph. Nicely done!

[Mai L Nissen]

Thank you for reading and reviewing, Jennie! Much appreciated :)

[stansg]

Its a very sweet and well written story. I like the fact that you are very descriptive.
Perhaps distribution should not be equal but according to need? - At least in regard to ice cream. like this line, it made me chuckle.
Your description of the little girls playtime is very vivid, i could relate to it since i grew up with two sisters. You girls are very organized in your games even as little kids, boys on the other hand just run around breaking stuff at that age, at least the boys i grew up with;)
All in all a great work, technically solid, very descriptive, Loved it.

P.S.:She just stood there with her new schoolbag still on her bag and her arms straight down glued to the sides of her body---- Take a look at this line, i didn't quite get it.

[Mai L Nissen]

Thank you for your kind review and suggestion, Stansg. I will take a look at it :)

[Mila]

Congratulations on winning the Need Reviews? IV contest!

Beautifully captured the mind and heart of a child, well done!

-Mila

[MsJewel]

You have captured the quirky things we do as children and how it doesn't seem quirky at all in the mind of an innocent child. Loved the part about eating ice cream - I liked it a bit melty and mushed together myself.
I think your story is very well written and vivid in description.
Great work.
:) Julie

[Mai L Nissen]

Thank you, Julie. I appreciate you kind words and your thoughts :)

[nazia]

The way you captured the essence of the thoughts going on in the mind of a little girl is appreciable. I actually have very little memory of that small an age of mine. but I guess even if I remembers it would be no different from what you have written. So thank you very much for making me live my childhood again

[Mai L Nissen]

Thank you, Nazia. Glad you it gave you just little sense of your childhood :)

[Coyote Poetry]

The story is well-written. You create interesting character and I liked her thoughts. I liked how you create life and understanding for her. Thank you for sharing the excellent story.
Coyote

[Mai L Nissen]

Thank you for your kind review, Coyote! I appreciate you taking the time :)

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome.

[ANTO]

Its not a huge story Mai which suits me with my attention deficit issues - the main reason I avoid stories.
Its a vignette.Oh wait, its only part 1 ... no matter

Paragraph one is sooo charming and witty.

"Perhaps distribution should not be equal but according to need? - At least in regard to ice cream..." lol - as one who can bite ice-cream without any adverse reactions I totally concur with this xD

"she was very good at wiggling her toes too" - aww - this writing is so endearing

The paragraph on adapting systems is brilliant. Full of wit and child's logic (often irrefutable)

"took the first step into the schoolyard. Perhaps a little nervous as well..." - wow, what memories came flooding with this! I literally hugged the school yard wall for ages before I ventured into the 'fray' - wallflower was never more apt. Bittersweet this part...for me

You nailed this phase of Life Mai. Etiquette and social norms all have to be 'discovered' (usually the hard way lol. This really brought me back to simpler (in terms of responsibility) yet paradoxically more confusing times.

all in all its a lovely tale of a beautifully pragmatic little lady. I loved this.

[Mai L Nissen]

Thanks, Anto. Glad you liked it :) I did not think too much about my intentions until after writing half of it...

[Mai L Nissen]

Oh, and the bit about eating ice cream is basically just a description of my childhood...