True Love Never Dies

I know I talk about him a lot. And I know it's annoying. But I can't help it. I've tried to stop. I've tried to move on, but my heart won't let go. He's all I ever think about. Everyone tells me to just forget about him like it's so easy. It kills me. Losing him was one of the worst pains I've ever felt. I've never loved anyone in this world as much as I love him. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about all the good times we've had. I only put on a smile for his sake. I don't want him to feel bad, but it literally tears me apart. Every night I lay in bed and wonder what I did wrong. Everybody thinks I should hate him because of everything that's happened between us, but honestly, he's the only person that's ever made me 100% happy. And without him, I can't ever be whole again. I'll never be okay. I'll never get over him. I'm sorry. I know that makes me a horrible person. I know it makes me a piece of s**t to keep fighting for something that will never happen, but when you love someone as much as I love him, it doesn't just go away. He doesn't like me. He doesn't love me. He doesn't even really consider me a friend. We don't talk that much anymore. Everything went bad. Nothing is right with us anymore. And I hate it. I wish I could fix it, but I feel like all I do is f**k up and make things worse. He may not know it, but he keeps my heart beating. I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for him..